Category Archives: Novels

Bald Seal Prelude

Baker Bloch next checked Hana Lei for survivors, but the members of the band Lamb — Peter, Paul and Mary — were nowhere to be found. Baker thought of the perhaps odd coincidence that the 3 locations beginnning with “H” in his overall lexicon were all clustered together if sorted by number of posts. 15 for Hana Lei here, 16 for Heartsdale, and then 14 for Horizons. But none of these places seemed relevant any longer — all used up for meaning. He couldn’t stop thinking about the 3 “H”‘s, though, and how it perhaps — again — points to the Omega continent (through Kentucky). Better get back to Bauerbridge, then…

… but the high dune had been masked by a thick thicket of trees. Big Thicket? Edward Swift once more?

April Mae’s small cemetery remains at the edge of the thicket, where her husband Septimius Felton was buried and which we see her visit several times in the last Collagesity novel (last?).

I’ll just do a little grave maintenance while I’m here.


The Angel of Death reached out for Baker Bloch’s hat again.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0013, 0106, HANA LEI, Heartsdale+, Horizons, Kentucky, Mountain Lake

not core

“I’m not sure if I can get rid of the two of you — this house.”

“Well you must in my opinion,” spoke up Mssr. Gold, feeling himself unnecessary for the new novel if he’s not dreaming of The Waste, Fruity Islands, End of Time, and Rosehaven all in one. “As I understand, this is suppose to be an analysis of what has gone on before. Unless you want us to help with with *that* part.”

“Unsure,” admitted Baker Bloch. He turned to the person on his couch. “What do you think April Mae?”

“I think we *must* return to the Omega continent and I’m glad you have a new foothold there with this Gold Mountain. Full of golden goodness and unlimited possibilities. You build off from there and you’ll be fine.” She looked over at her husband. Herbert Gold after all. “Isn’t that right, dear?”

“Dear?”

“Oh dear,” both Baker Bloch and April Mae Flowers spoke at once.

Looks like the couple won’t be in the new book after all.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0013, 0105, Purden/Snowlands

The Bald Seal

Without hat, Baker Bloch stood upon the sim line dividing Treasure Hill neatly in 2.

He thinks there may be 2 Treasure Hills which are actually one, but he needs to get Roger Pine Ridge over to Grassy Noll’s place asap to start the process of finding out…

END OF PART 1 OF 16 OF “BAKER’S DOZEN: AN ANALYSIS OF THE COLLAGESITY NOVELS”!

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0013, 0104, Mountain Lake

Treasure Hill found (!)

“It wasn’t the one with the snowy peak,” continued Wheeler, still at the head of the Table. “It was another — split as well, though. And the 2 involved sims, just like the 2 involved sims below them in a north to south line, indicate what is going on. The Oracle is no longer stuck at (Goddess) Morgaine. We know that this is really Morgan, or that’s another name she goes by.”

“But who is Morgan?”

“Who do you think?”

“Silly question. I suppose.” Baker considered the next step. “We know that the Oracle is attempting to speak to us, me, directly in a more specific way now. We have crossed into another hemisphere, and that is precisely what it’s saying to us. The Omega continent is the Orient, all the other mainland continents to the far west are equivalent to the Occident. The two *needed* to be separate, and that is good and well.”

“Well,” Wheeler interjected.

“Apples over here, oranges over there.”

“Novel 12 — because I’m not going to call it “Collagesity 2018-2019 Winter” or whatever ridiculously convoluted name it actually has. No, this Collagesity Novel *12* is set about everywhere else *except* Mainland. Four “Others”, weaving in and out of each other with Rosehaven the more dominant. What is the tale told? Is it the final one of Our Second Lyfe? No, I’d like to talk about how we, the core avatars, share or parcel out the other avatars — like Mabel and Ruby.”

“Yours,” Baker Bloch indicates.

“Yes. Like Pitch Darkly is *yours*. Anyways, we must get back to the Oracle. You know another trick now. Look at Corsica.”

—–

“Orient and Occident should remain separate.”

“Absolutely,” Wheeler enforced. “That is my decree. For the next 3 years, for the next 30 years.”

“No pictures.”

“No pictures.”

—–

“You know what I mean about…”

“Yes.”

“This is acceptable.”

“Sure. So this is the Oracle, Wheeler.”

“Kind of. 1/2 and 1/2. It’s over there as well.” Wheeler points behind her, at the adjacent parcel with the big cyan bell. Counterpart to the big cyan crystal here, seemingly. Both atop the mountain.

“Split,” further explains Wheeler. “Like much of what makes up Our Second Life. Like you and I in ways. We are not a couple.”

“No,” Baker Bloch reinforced.

“You and Baker Blinker aren’t a couple.”

“Nope.”

“But Baker Blinker and Karoz are — were. Still are. In their make believe land of Chilbo. How are they doing over there? I haven’t heard from Karoz since Collagesity Novel 7.”

“When you were playing the role of Billy Jean Kidd, yes.” Baker pauses.

“We wrestled. We might have even played tennis if it were allowed. The Gods didn’t allow it. Karoz remains with Baker Blinker.”

“That’s good. They are a nice and decent couple.”

“I will never marry.”

Baker Bloch thought about this statement from Wheeler. “What about…”

“No. Let me list down through the months, nay years now: Baker Blinker, Karoz, Dr. Mulholland, John Lockfry, Allen Martin, Philip Strevor, Marion Harding, The Musician, Campbell Opine… Opp… Tropp… I may be missing a few.”

“That is all good and fine, Wheeler. We are not here to judge but to worship.”

“Yes, I *may* as well be married to you, Baker Bloch. A marriage of convenience. That way I get to dig into your vast inventory. All the old Moard Ling buildings you can’t get on the marketplace nor inworld any longer.”

“I can lend you those any time you wish.”

“Yes, but they wouldn’t be mine, to pull out and examine at my discretion. So it’s set. We will get married. For convenience.”

“No, Wheeler. You know I can’t…”

“I know. No ding dong.” Wheeler glanced over at the giant cyan bell. “I will make due with others.”

“No. No way.”

“Then you must choose, Baker Bloch. Are you Baker Bloch or… Pitch Darkly. Married to your Mary?”

“Maybe I *will* become Pitch. Maybe. If it’s either this or that.”

“It could be.”

—–

“I think Tropp might be the one, Wheeler. That’s why Magus Ellen and Sidechick Corea were so interested in guiding his development. He started out as a kid, a toy, and became a man. Beyond even a big boy.”

“Grassy Noll, then, may be the key after all. Put him in the new novel.”

“Already done,” replied Baker, thinking back to post 1.

“No, I mean give him a story. Probably back in Iris wouldn’t you think?”

“Do you wish to go back?”

“Roger,” spoke Wheeler knowingly.

Baker Bloch nodded. It sounded right.

Punishment.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0013, 0103, Mountain Lake, Rubi

and the rest

But we know about them already (Baker Blinker, Karoz Blogger, Hucka Doobie).

“Next!”

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0013, 0102, Rubi

the 2 biggies and 5 more

There is no fairer than thee
Collagesity
So I will return
To have more of my fun

—–

“Look Baker Bloch. I’m Edward Swift. From Ruby.”

“Nice one, Wheeler. Soooo… you’re still the head honcho around here I’m taking it. Or so you claim.”

“I *am*.”

“But me too.”

“Right. We must clarify *core*. There’s only 8 chairs around this Table, but there are 10 cores.”

“Maybe we can discard two. As was done before… over in Nascera.”

“Maybe. So let’s start. Let’s bring them all in here.”

“Alright.”

——

“Sitting by my side now is Tropp, formerly Opp formerly Campbell Opine.” She takes a gander at him. “My my, you’re looking good today in your birthday hat Mr. Tropp.”

“Thank you.”

“Care to tell us about yourself… for the reader or readers?”

“I was born Campbell Opine, an Mmmmmm (blue). But I grew beyond my toyhood beginnings. That’s about it.”

“Speaking of which, let’s bring in the next core. Grassy Noll. Now this isn’t Grassy Noll — nor Salad Bar Jack for that matter — but we’re going to call him that. Like I am Wheeler but not Wheeler, see?”

Tropp nods. Baker replies: “But not me.”

“Again, yes.”

—–

So here’s Grassy. That’s your cousin, Tropp.”

“I know. Hi Grassy.”

“Hi cuz. My you’ve grown since I last saw you!”

“Thanks.”

“So Grassy. My good friend who I bummed around Iris with last year. Tell us about yourself. What you’ve been up to?”

“Still in Iris, Wheeler. I wrote you. You never wrote back.” Grassy makes a pouty face.

“Yes, sorry about that. I’ve been running around here and there. Trying to keep up with Baker.”

“That’s alright. I know you’re busy, Wheeler… Bill. But I want you to come see me (!).”

“I will Grassy. Very soon. And thanks for remaining such a good friend.”

“You’re welcome. And Tropp or Campbell or whatever you go by now… you come as well.”

“Oh I will. Thanks as well.”

“Goodbye Grassy,” spoke Wheeler in parting. “We’ll be seeing you soon.”

“Yes, goodbye my cousin,” added Tropp. “I have grown beyond you and toydom in general but that’s still my roots, and you are my anchor there.”

“Good to know,” answered Grassy, not quite knowing how to take that. Nevertheless, a tear forms in his eye. It is time for him to return to Iris, understanding that friend and family haven’t forgotten about him. He will catch up with them soon. He’s been busy as well!

—-

“Next we have Spongeberg. Spongeberg the Destroyer,” Wheeler enlarged. “Hi Spongeberg.”

“Hello. I never mentioned, to you or others, that my home of Mystenopolis over on the Nautilus continent has been erased. One section remains though… and I checked tonight real quick since I’m not inworld very much at all any more. Thanks for rezzing me and inviting me back to the Table.”

“You’re welcome. Sorry about Mystenopolis. I suppose I didn’t know. And the giant Jesus statue?”

“Erased.”

“How about the duplicate? The giant faun… opposite in nature. The great duality.”

“I’m not sure.”

“Well, I’ll pop over there myself sometime soon and see for myself, since you’ve so kindly reminded me of it.”

“Goodbye, Wheeler. Nice to see you again. Nice to meet you Tropp. You two guys have fun in Collagesity. It’s a great place and I’m glad I didn’t destroy it several years back. But, just to warn, I leave open that option, and there’s not a darn tooten thing you can do about it.”

Tropp laughed at this, but Spongeberg kept a straight face. Wheeler stared at him. In ways Spongeberg’s power goes beyond hers. If he desires to destroy Collagesity, indeed he can. She must keep him on her good side. “Anything to add here?” Wheeler calls over to the silent Baker Bloch.”

“Nah. Good to see you as well, Spongeberg.”

“So long,” he said to all.

—-

“Let’s see,” started Wheeler again. “Next I suppose we should bring in Roger Pine Ridge. He has elevated himself through hard work to become a core member of our Table.

—–

“Welcome Roger Pine Ridge.”

“Happy to be here.”

“Tell us about yourself.”

“I started out as rough and gruff Biker Mann, consort to Cyberpaperdoll. We lived here right in Collagesity in one of the SoSo Mall apartments. Great view down Old Cannon Road into the woods. Many a night I’ve stared down into the trees smoking my special cigarettes and seeing various creatures emerge from them… or imagined they did. Giants, dwarfs, robots, elves, candy people, holiday figures… you name it.”

“Bandits?” asked Wheeler sneakily.

“Um.”

“Never mind that. Bad joke. So Cyberpaperdoll left you for another man. Tell us about that.”

“I think you just did. Bandit Boy.”

“Right. So I did. And, let’s see, you yourself are a bandit. Stole something very important from Collagesity a while back. Care to tell us about *that*?” She meant the Rainbow Sphere.

“Nah, probably should go.” Roger Pine Ridge understood this invitation to be a trap now. “Tata,” he said in parting.

—–

“We have one more for tonight, Baker Bloch and Tropp. Looks like Lockfry Resident. But who is *he* — at the core? Let’s see.”

—–

“I don’t think we’ve met you before sir… ma’am.”

“No,” the ambiguous being replies. “I don’t know who I am.”

—–


Remembering.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0013, 0101, Rubi, The Cross

End

But Ruby (Fantasie) had already left the Borderlands and entered Rosehaven proper with the true coming of spring. She has emerged from between the tigers’ tails which are actually Tiger Tail. This was the true meaning of Eraserhead Man’s vision of the Tigrett in Vineyard Cafe, for they are one and the same, tiger tales both now.

The Borderlands Oracle, the *Mother*, is currently stuck on the figure of Morgaine, an ambivalent character from Arthurian legend who can take on both negative and positive roles. Red and blue if you will. Surrounded by 12 rounded rocks, this border also signals the end of our yarn or weaving, or as far as we can take it currently. Our 12th Collagesity novel.

Borderlands has greenly homogenized with Rosehaven as a whole. There’s no need for a tale now within. We are done with it. Same with Fruity Islands, End of Time, The Waste. All put away in the creative closet, perhaps pulled out later for further play.

The Brachiosaurus which doubles as a sea monster here seems to be telling Baker B(loch) goodbye.

But what of Mssr. Gold and wife April Mae Flowers of Snowlands? Herbert Gold will keep dreaming of these lands for certain — he is stuck as well. April Mae will keep seeing the gardener Steve on the side and visiting her ex’s grave over on the Omega continent. The mysterious Bauerbridge dune will remain an obstacle in her way.

Despite the end of perhaps a cycle of Collagesity novels, Collagesity itself also goes onward, up and away and beyond the effects of any storyline. For this is home. The anchor. From here I can enter any world I dare to penetrate with a certain style of wizardry: Stonethwaite, Tugaske, Avebury. All the “satellite” realms. But one has to have a center to return to.

So I, Baker B., Baker Blinker and Baker Bloch both, will say goodbye to you my loyal reader while sitting at home sipping on my Starbucks 4 shot latte and enjoying the relative warmth of an early spring night.

END OF “COLLAGESITY 2018-2019 WINTER”!

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0012, 0618, Mountain Lake, Rose Heaven-, Rubi

rounding it out

Eraserhead Man re-created the scene. “The drawbridge will CLOSE! The delegation from CALEDONIA — not CALEDON mind you — will move across with the Prince to meet the ones from ROSEHAVEN on the other side! The closing of the BRIDGE represents the closing of the GAP between the two QUEENDOMS. KINGDOMS… whatever!”

Hearing aids, thinks Sandy Beech opposite him at the Vineyard Cafe table. He’s forgotten them again. Where’s that Ruby woman when she’s needed — he never shouts around her, aids or no aids. A magical relationship. He then has an idea.

“Where’s the actor playing Ruby now? Is she still up in Borderlands?”

“What’s that?!”

“The ACTOR playing RUBY. Where is she?!” Sandy Beech forgot his own aids — the blue, calming pills.

“OH: BORDERLANDS.”

It took a few minutes, but Sandy finally got the idea in his director’s head that they should go visit her… check the scene out that may end the current production. The oracle and such. “That sphere over there,” and he indicates with his head a table across from them in the cafe without looking, “is only a terminal! We need to find where the MOTHER oracle is!”

“I see a TIGRETT over there, Sandy!” Eraserhead Man then declared, fingers nervously pattering against the table. “What do YOU see?!”

Sandy turned.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0012, 0617, Caledonia, Rose Heaven-

double down

From the famed Nepenthe Gate at the southern edge of Rosehaven, Princess Merry Gouldbusk stared out at the void separating her almost-queedom and Caledon Caledonia. She thought about the rising water that would result in the re-merger. Tomorrow! “2 meters, Sandy. What harm could be done? I can re-terraform the little coastline that might be flooded.”

“None atall, my dear,” spoke Herbert Dune behind her, ignoring the botched name again. I’m still under contract! the actor screamed in his mind, however. *Herbert*. Herbert Dune. Dummkopf.

The actor playing Merry Gouldbusk realized her gaff. “Oh, let me start again on that.” She turned toward the camera. “Can I just start again?” Her face was turning red.

“Well. I guess we’ll *have* to now,” groused Sandy, thinking the name could have been voiced over in post-production later on, along with a good number of other mistakes made by his co-star only in the last several days. But not now. And time was short… the snow was almost gone! But he must *affect* love again. Because Herbert Dune truly loves his soon-to-be Queen. The actor playing Herbert Dune despises the actor playing Merry Gouldbusk, though: one Lilly Frame, fresh off the bus from Ontario. That was a little disguised fact.

Director Eraserhead Man sets the scene again.

Cameraman Blinky was ready to roll. “And… action!”

“2 meters, Sandy… oops!”

“Oh GOD!!”

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0012, 0616, Caledonia, Rose Heaven-

arrival 03

It took them half a day to reach another of those clear spaces where they could make enough sense to each other for more of the story.

“A railroad oval. An engine runs into a caboose. Tale before the tiger,” Marion explained. “A race between beginning and end, she said. Tale wins.”

“Maybe tails win,” Billy Jean King said while sitting on a small bed in the corner of the otherwise almost unfurnished and undecorated cabin. “As in a coin. Flipping a coin — heads and tails.”

“Maybe.”

“What else?”

“She said to always pay attention to the blue roses. They always indicate something. We looked west now. Two thrones — blue roses to side. She said these were the Prince and Princess of Rosehaven, but only when Caledon is Caledonia.”

“See?” BJK nudged Philip sitting beside her in the ribs. “I *told* you it was Caledon. Maybe we were in the wrong place to start with.”

“No,” insisted Marion. “We were definitely in the right place. Caledonia. And then — get this — they removed their, er, masks. Actually the Prince had on some rainbow swirly globe or something — over his head. The princess just shed her golden skin, like a snake. ‘Let the waters rise,’ they said in unison, then. I looked around but didn’t see any water, let alone water rising. But something had changed. I could feel it.”

I also noticed there was a tiny bit missing from the Prince’s fin-foot, like it was bitten a little bit.”

“A little *bite*,” BJK insisted. She turned toward Philip knowingly. Philip just stared back blankly.

“The Princess’ shoe was right there.”

“Achilles heel?” BJK offered, visualizing it backwards in her mind.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0012, 0615, Caledonia, Rose Heaven-