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hunger games

Ahh, the imposter. “Hi Reddie.”

Now if I can just find a standing version of Saffie here we can go on more diverse dates. Otherwise… might be back to Audrey, etc. Theater and dinners only go so far.

—–

Strange foreign accent; woman: “I’m look-ing for Norm the Cash-ier.”

“You’re looking at her.” She recognizes the war paint. “Oh God.”

“Yes. Pay-ment time.” Norm barely resists putting out both of her hands in defense. She *knew* this day was coming. At least Barry isn’t here to see all this.

“2989 per month for the pipe-line to the ri-ver, just like we a-greed. Sixty-one times forty-nine.”

“Okay, okay.” Norm the Cashier knew she didn’t have the money. Could she faint to distract? How about a fake heart attack. Polio. That’s it. “I’ve been diagnosed with something.”

“Ohh?”

“Poli- poli- po-LICE! POLICE! POLI–!”

Burt, did you hear anything just then?”

“Oh, sorry.” He turned a bit red. “Burritos for lunch.”

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seeing

The next night found him walking again, still looking for that perfect house. Saffie had snatched the only decent one rental baron Snowmanster had available at the time. Marty felt he was snubbed; that Snowmanster didn’t like the looks of him for some reason. He’d given her a nice painting of her husband, all for nothing it appeared. The short meeting was adjourned. At least he got a date with Saffie out of it. Maybe the whole problem could be solved with…

No, he couldn’t go in that direction quite yet. After all, he was still technically married to Linda. The lush. And he was still sort of dating Cathy Love Peace Hippie Child, if she’s still alive. And then there’s Audrey — on and on it goes, actually. Hucka Doobie: another one. He needs to phone her up. Marty makes a mental note to look up the number again; he thinks he added it to his long contact list but wasn’t sure. What was that bar they went to way up in the air above Urqhart? The place of perpetual rain: Fireman’s? Wasn’t sure.

He reached the center of the 4096 Illuminati property. He stopped walking. The elevation was 2000 meters. He looked up and noticed red had replaced green in the most central banner. But not another apple this time despite the still appropriate color. Another skull instead. This place was a land of the dead. He’d literally reached a dead end.

Sipping green-ish lemonade still — probably a limeade, then, wouldn’t you think? — he decided to head back to the green apple banner marking the beginning point when the voices started. A murmur at first, then clearing. He picked out the repeating sentence amongst the babble. “You have something that we want.” Over and over and over it went until the voices unified in a deafening crescendo.

—–

He woke with a start. “Godchild” Lisa the Vegetarian was still onstage, talking about the limitations of the capitalist system through something called debt paradox. He shouldn’t have fallen asleep. But Saffie beside him seemed enthralled — she was literally on the edge of her seat listening in. She could teach him like Linda taught him about vegetarianism. And Lisa of course could aid in his understanding about the economic end times to come as well. If we, as a world, only stopped eating at least *red* meat then part of the problem would just go away. Just like that (he imagines snapping his fingers). Stupid Earth, pheh. He sits up and becomes one with Saffie again in the viewing.

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lighten up, er, 04?

“I was hoping the picture would help me get a new house.”

“Not if *I* can help it.” Saffie was a rival renter. She wanted the best for her and her family of 5 children, 3 dogs, 2 ferrets, and 1 husband. For now.

Marty checked his watch. “Where *is* he?”

“*She*,” Saffie helped for the moment at least. “Snowmanster is a  *she*, jees. Do you want to get a better house or not, blimey?”

“Blimey? You’re British?”

“No.” But Saffie turned red here. She knew she’d slipped up. She also looked at her watch, hoping that Snowmanster would show up asap. Before too much was revealed.

“Do you know Liverpool by chance?”

“I don’t eat meat,” she returned dumbly.

“Ahh. A Vegetarian. Then you must know *Linda*.”

“Lisa?” Didn’t work.

“*Yes*. Her too.”

Where was this going? At least we escaped the pitchfork guy, blimey.

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lighten up 03

Spongebub, through his new, lightened up picture, led me to this crosswalk in front of an apparently secret, or maybe not so secret, Illuminati center. After playing around, logically enough, with Illuminatus the God of Chaos and Destruction crossing the road in front of Annie Lee (hi Annie Lee!), I decided to go with Marty. He moved across this very same road back in photo-novel, um, 20, when I was still based in nearby Urqhart. To a bigger house — didn’t work out. It was simply too ugly for Marty to continue with his role in this location. The Urqhart (or thereabouts) version of Collagesity soon succumbed as well. Tower destroyed. So here’s the walking Marty version of the above picture.

Where’s he going? Is that still beer he’s drinking or has it turned to lemonade (in the meantime)? Is it yellow still? Looks kinda green to me, a green-ish tint anyway. Snowbob must be around. Maybe Snowmanster too.

No, there’s Snowmanster crossing the road instead of Marty. He’s going to visit his son, Snowbob. *Sorry*, *she’s* going to visit *her* son.

“It’s about time we brought her back,” I can hear Spongebub say back in Iris. So let’s turn the camera around a bit, follow Snowmanster inside, and see what we have…

And I think I’ll go with Marty instead of Snowmanster here after all. He may be meeting Harrison Jett instead of the latter meeting… well, let’s just have a look.

Turns out Marty is meeting Snowbob, jees. Wonder what *they’ll* have to talk about? Can we tune in? Maybe we need a translator.

“He SAID, he’s LYKEN it!!”

Must be talking about the picture Marty brought with him, hmm.

“Bring it in my OFFICE!! And we’ll see how it works THERE!!”

Okay, you can stop now.

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lighten up 02

“Let’s go with *this* picture instead, Hindsight, er, Golden.”

“Yes, call me Golden. For now.”

“O-*kay*, Golden (*tee hee*).”

“More light, I agree.” Hindsight/Golden knew the squeaky voiced sponge being was always right. He was worshiped in many galaxies.

Those who didn’t worship him were often left in the dark. Pitchfork territory.

He has a son. I’ll deal with him next. Hindsight/Golden turns here toward the CB Dylan dresser. “And the wife.”

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Filed under **VIRTUAL, 0022, 0201, Iris^

Chef-de…

“You are the station master, sir. You must know something.”

“I am… The Devil.”

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Filed under **VIRTUAL, 0022, 0117, Iris^

the source and the lake 02

“We must keep testing games, Chef-inspector *Petty*. Carcassonne is good, but–”

“Carcassonne is the one,” Petty emphasized rapid fire, refusing to play this new one. It was too far along in the year.

Hindsight (Golden) kept waiting for collage elements to show up as repercussions. And there they are.

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the source and the lake

I can see the Rainbow Sphere but I can’t get to it. Banned. Roger Pine Ridge still could, though. And therein lies the problem.

We must return to Iris.

“Some year we’re having, eh Spore?”

“Iiiim LOVING it!”

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Piera

https://bakerbloch.com/2017/02/11/48909/

“So what is ‘Billfork’ you might be asking?” then said Baker Bloch. “Well, on the audio side it’s primarily ‘Boom Dot Bust’ by Firesign Theatre. On the video side it’s the movie ‘Northfork’ by the Polish twins, Michael and Mark. As Tin S. Man alluded to, both feature towns that have to be moved in order to be saved. The town of Northfork is being flooded by a new lake. Billville is threatened by tornadoes, and also, strangely and syncily, a flood at the end, where the mayor has to turn into a fish and ‘swim, swim, swim’ to stay alive.”

Baker Bloch positioned 8 oranges around The Table instead of handing them to people in chairs like before. He was about to fill in the spaces between the oranges with lemons and limes as prescribed by the Billfork Core Diagram when chef-inspector Keat Owens stopped him. “Stand back and look what you have,” he rather commanded. “But –” Baker protested, “I haven’t finis–.” Owens interrupts him by reciting all the numbers that count: “1 – 4 – 7 – 10 – 13 – 16 – 19 – 22. And who is 22?” Baker counted clockwise as well from his south-southwest position, all the clockwork oranges, just to double check. He stared at Owens. He points at him with one of his now orange free hands.

“Correct. Here’s what we’re going to actually do next. Sit down beside me at ‘1’ and we’ll start.” With this, he had light bulbed headed Curled Paper go in back and bring out the game that everyone was raving about lately over in The City.

—-

“Do I still need my orange?”

“No.”

“‘Cause I’m hungry.”

“Go ahead. You can have mine too.”

“Bravo. So what’s this game called again?”

They then built The River from certain pieces inside the box and named it Amazon.

(to be continued)

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Filed under **VIRTUAL, 0022, 0114, Iris^, NWES Island

City

“I’m telling you, Owens. That handle was *broken* last night when I woke up. Now — it’s okay! I’m not lying to you, though. And I’m *not* crazy.”

“I didn’t say you were,” replied the calm, cool chef-inspector. “I’m just trying to get the facts. So — you woke up when the door slammed. This was when the other Sandy — in the dream — left the store — sans bikini bottom.”

“It was her tail and her little purple skirt, but I guess you could say ‘correct’ to that. I can’t recall her wearing anything else. When the cold, naked air blew in through the door when I went downstairs after I awoke I knew that she was the same: cold; naked; out *there*. The door slammed again, then. The handle was *broken*. Someone *broke* it. The dream was real!”

“Calm down, sir. Calm down. You said the door slammed in your dream and you awoke. Then you said the door slammed again after you awoke. But then you said Sandy — the other one, the dream one — *slammed* her tail and skirt down on the table between male bastards — think that was your words again — Renaldo O’Donnell and King Orange, saying they could have them. Strange you remember such specific names for a dream, Sandy Beech.” Then chef-inspector Keat Owens considered that *this* was a dream, and not the first time. It all started with the remembering of Spongebub.  “But this could be the door slamming again,” he completed his analysis. “Except you didn’t awake just then, only with the subsequent slamming.”

Sandy considered this. Two realities were superimposing themselves on top of each other, inadvertently (perhaps) creating chaos and confusion.  He simply didn’t know; he simply couldn’t understand. In the moment.

(to be continued)

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