Category Archives: 0034

00340307

August 14, 1974. Lucy Blue Dress takes one last look back at the campsite she’d stayed her summer after graduating from high school. She’d miss the cool cool stream that flowed and sometimes cascaded by her tent. She’d miss the gatherings at Sugar’s shack with all the weirdos of the woods. She’d miss more organized White Tree Village and dreamy Bluebird who lived there and who she took occasional long walks with. Most of all, there was Titiana and Vanessa, her bestest friends during this period in her life. “Come with me to college!” she begged of them beside their favorite wagon near the shack near the center. “No, we stay here,” said Vanessa, which made Titiana nod. They all called her Tiana, because her full name was just a little too much to pronounce in casual conversation. She didn’t like it but she accepted the shortening; she was growing up and becoming more mature about such things. Both were smart. Both took the SATs and did well enough to go to their pick of at least a public school. But: no. The woods had captivated them beyond escape. The Ourobos that is the stream had worked its magic, beginning matched with end. They would be happy going round in circles the rest of their lives, without a worldly degree, without a decent and rewarding job that resulted in such, without the ability to support a family beyond perhaps a husband or wife — both girls swung either way on that preference. “The woods will take care of us,” they said, and bade her farewell with teary hugs just minutes ago. They offered to follow her to the campsite down the stream and see her off from her woodlands home of 2 months but she said this wasn’t necessary, and there was no reason for them to watch her leave they way they all came: alongside the brick wall that led outta here. This corner is where the woods die for her.

And then there was Zappa, who was set to leave the forest himself tomorrow. Or the day after tomorrow at the latest, he promised. “Just gotta wrap up something at the cemetery,” he said minutes before she then met with Vanessa and Titiana that one last time.

He was the love of her life. Pretty sure of that, she was. Going to college with her, he was. Studying math: her, psychology. Stats would be their shared passion beyond the bed. They determined there was a 24.687531% chance they would return here after college, using their acquired skills to better the woods and their denizens and citizens. Never happened. The zero and nine would have to be added in to make it work and that, they realized, would defeat the whole purpose. Worldly they remained.

In one reality.

(to be continued)

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X. Vampire

“Who the f– are you now?”

“I am the writer.”

(pause) “I thought Mistress and Venus were the writers of this tale. On-the-Mattress Mistress and her sister. Mistress’ sister.”

“No. I write them.” Smoke gets in his eyes but he doesn’t love himself. He loves the other. “And I have help. The artist. Just downstairs. You know him too. Another Barry. just like we now have 2 Lucys. He sleeps while I write. I write while he sleeps. It’s a win win situation.” He exhales more smoke, readies his hands on the keyboards. “2 hours till sunrise and the other Barry takes over. Better get back to it (type type type bell/carriage return).”

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straightening out a problem

A person was found dead at 64/64 Koryo just outside the brick wall surrounding the manor. Lucy was her name, yet another character the woods produced, spat out in an attempt to tell as much of its story as I possibly can. Lucy doesn’t fit in?

So that’s Zapppa at 32/32 in the corner of the graveyard, Lucy here, and, let’s see, *another* Lucy — dead again it seems, and sans head this time — with a more science fictiony outfit at 96/96…

… and then to complete the first half of our diagonal across the sim, in the very center, we have dreaming Billy Clock at 128/128 or, more specifically, his tag along, blasted damned Wither Tree, as well as, I would assume, that giant waterfall Mistress named Falls of 10000 Lions he also manifests when snoozing.

Yes, there it is not far away, with roar indeed deafening.

Barrels seen from 160/160. *There’s* Science Fiction Lucy. She’s okay as it turns out. Must be part of the dream.

More woods at 192/192 not surprisingly. And there’s the other Lucy, the first one, sprung back to life, hmm. She faces a covered bridge at the northwest edge of White Tree Village here.

Then a dead Zappa or something hanging near the center of a different covered bridge at 224/224, leading out of WTV on its other side…

… bringing us to the end, which is the same as the beginning: 256/256 > 0/0.

Now to clean all this raw information up.

—–

Got it! Everything relates to that central stream running basically northeast to southwest across Koryo. You can clearly see it from all key spots on our diagonal outlined above. Beginning indeed does equals end.


beginning


end

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00340304

Humorously designed sign at the beginning of a local trail you probably wouldn’t know about unless you’re a devoted mountain biker, since it’s way up a 750 foot knob (The Knob). Not the easiest location to reach by foot.

And on the other side of this same trail: that damn moving gnome. The other day I dared to touch the possibly cursed object for closer examination. It looks to me upon turning it over that the name of the little f-er is Stinkerfoot — logical extension of “…inkerfoot”.

But when googling Stinkerfoot up popped at the top of my search results this video of a song called “Stink-Foot” by Frank Zappa from his most famous album “Apostrophe”, its closing track. This album also contains the well known “Don’t Eat the Yellow Snow” I just referenced in a recent post.

Google also offered to search specifically for Stinkerfoot instead of the suggested Stinkfoot, but upon doing so understood why they substituted the latter in the first place. Nothing really significant found using the former. So there you have it. Zappa works his way back into our story from a direction you might least expect.

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00340303

The next day Newt goes out to the Rolls Royce Dawn roadster to retrieve the “Monolith”, painting or photograph — we don’t know until he opens the trunk. But then (*gasp*), he finds it empty, no art within. He tries to calm down. Maybe it was in the trunk of the other car, the 1947 Black Bean Rod 9 that Eyela just purchased before their long vacation, had to have to give them something to be cheerful about upon their return, she said. Maybe something was wrong with the lock on this trunk — shouldn’t be, since it’s such an expensive car and manufactured so carefully, at least according to reputation — and Benny put the art in the other trunk for safekeeping. So he tries that one as well (*double gasp*). It was there… but in a different form. And broken in pieces. He takes the pieces out of the trunk, carefully, er, pieces them together in the garage — making sure to shut the doors beforehand. This was Benny’s lone day off, but Benny sometimes shows up to work anyway to put in some extra time — off the clock of course. He’s just that dedicated. Good ol’ Benny, Newt thinks amidst the chaos. But *this*. He stands back, taking in the thing that he’s created. It could tumble at any moment. But this is what he saw.

I believe it is the same as the monolith in the Big Woods Zapppa woke up to yesterday. The woods that are right over there, just beyond the brick wall surrounding the manor, protecting it. The stuff of dreams.

It’s time to find out what this is all about, really.

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experience

“Why do you keep your bathing suit on (in the tub)? You understand we’re married — no need to be formal.” But Wheeler, I mean, Eyela knew it was necessary. Eyela Gold, her newest incarnation. She also understood she had to ditch the purple hair in order for it to work long-term. Newt would lose interest if not. He preferred the new now: Newt likes new.

“It was a successful party, dearest,” she decided to say, dodging a bullet. “Trouble is (she suds her suddenly aching head while also rubbing/massaging it) — I… don’t remember much about it strangely enough. Like it was all, I don’t know, a *dream*.” She produces something from her hair; instantly knows it is the key. She hides this fact from Newt. She quietly places the golden object on the floor behind the tub, waiting to be picked up later when Newt had gone to bed or else to his study, if he can find it. 319, Eyela Gold reads on the thing. She must cover this fact up.

(to be continued)

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00340301

An urban legend claims that the monolith used in 2001: A Space Odyssey can be seen in some scenes of Zappa’s film 200 Motels (The Film). While a monolith can indeed be seen [most prominently at the beginning of the song “Penis Dimension”], it’s actually not the same one used in Kubrick’s film, as Kubrick had most of his models destroyed after 2001 was finished. On the same token Zappa didn’t film in the same studio Kubrick filmed 2001 in either. [1]

But it was the same, at least in spirit. And Zappa must have noted the 200-2001 similarity for the films. Subtraction of the 1 must have been satisfying for him, like he emasculated The Beatles with “We’re Only in It for the Money”. The monolith, the slab, is a penis with dimensions of 1:4:9. Perfection. It can all be telescoped back to 1 (and then gotten rid of).

—–

Zappp had long thought he’d always keep the extra p in his name after adding it in school. “Play Ruben and the Jets”, the children chided in the playground, lovers of doo-wop at an early age. “Sing Yellow Snow,” most of the same requested in jr. high after progressive rock became all the rage. You want extra p, he thought vindictively when all this went down, I’ll give you an extra p. At 9 o’clock on Wednesday’s Thursday’s Friday, October 5-7, 1973 he announced his name change. Zappp. 3 p’s in a row, not 2. *Now* try to make Zappp A. into Zappa, ya’ll.

But what he found in that grave when he dug up old man Franklin had him doing a rethink. It was a dream, yes. No one in their right mind would try to raise that dick from the dead. Sorcerer, everyone has heard. Wizard say some. Zappp knows it is the latter. Because he’s been contacting him via wegee board for years. Robert Franklin; Roberts and Franklin. Wonder what happened to Roberts, because they were quite the team, measuring their careers against each other, like, well, like the type of people they were. Probably doing the same kind of stuff in the afterlife. Again he should know. Old Man Franklin gives him an update from The Beyond at least every other week. Or the WIZARD does — Zapp is not quite convinced the 2 are one and the same, a logical reduction, despite mounting evidence over time. They sleep in the same metaphorical bed is all he concedes.

And then *this* when he wakes up. What is someone trying to tell him? He feels like the disposing of the newly placed Monolith over there — just digging it up (as well) perhaps — is the same as getting rid of the extra p in his name. Strong conviction on this.

He and Ben could do it together; he’s plenty strong but he’d need help from the stronger animal. But Ben had run away, totally frightened of the thing standing so shiny and alien in the far corner of the yard, and with that weird humm emitting from it, like some kind of dynamo — Dinah… Moe, hmm. Zappp couldn’t blame him. He’d like to run away in the woods too. Big Woods. Big Run. Anything besides facing another decision tree. While he’s at it, he may just dig up that tree as well.

(to be continued)

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Zappp Adams

“GRROWLLL!”

“What the?! — oh, hi Ben. You scared me you joker. I thought Eloise over there had come back to life!”

“GRROWLLL!”

“Yeah, I know. You’re probably starving. Been gone for 2 days. Where’ve you been… Ben, he he?”

“GRROWLL?”

“Well come on in and tell me all about it, then. We’ll eat breakfast and share stories. Because *I’ve* got something to tell *you* too, something you won’t believe.”

—–

“I don’t blame you, Ben. I don’t want to get too close to it either.”

“GRRRRROWWWWL!”

“I know. I’m scared too.”

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00340216

Benny meets something huge and inexplicable in the heart of the woods and instinctively turns into a flower to camouflage himself, just like he transformed from hamster to rat (or large mouse) before over at Newt and Eyela’s manor. Ends up that the monster before him is also named Ben, and also a shapeshifter ta boot. He’d just changed from a grizzly bear into a samsquanch to make himself bigger for an encounter with a detected rodent, spotted in his peripheral vision, he thought. They were scared of each other is what I’m saying, which caused the transformation in both, offensive versus defensive. Do they afterwards become friends? Not immediately: Ben doesn’t see Benny since the flower disguise is effective. He thinks the rodent has scuttled back into the forest, if he didn’t imagine the whole thing. And he can’t change back into a bear for 48 hours because of the involved energy drain. Same for Benny actually — he has to remain a flower for the same amount of time. It’s just the way things work for these kind of kindred shapeshifters, so different in size now but so similar in other ways. Yes, I think they have to become friends. Sugar’s shack will attract the 2 at the same time eventually and they’ll sit down and have a talk and find out how much they have in common, including — yikes! — both having secret *monoliths*. “How’d *that* happen?” they might simultaneously ask each other in this created scenario, probably so full of sugar by then that they don’t know what they’re saying or revealing. We’ll see how it plays out.


It worked! The thing is moving away.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL, Jeogeot, Middleton^, 0216, 0034

00340215

‘There (!). At the corner of the cemetery. Just like you predicted.”

“Just like I *directed*,” corrected Baker Blinker. Back in the saddle as I said, mysterious incapacitating illness over. Zapppa it was, but with an extra p. We’ve seen him before.

He turns. They’ve seen him and that’s all he wanted. Now to find that grave which told him everything, how it begins, how it ends, all the stuff in the middle.

There were quite a few to examine…

… not even counting the 3 tombs marked Henderson, Williams, Bennett. Those don’t sound right to him, though.

But *this* could be it.

He starts digging.

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