Category Archives: 05

February 12, 2019 · 7:36 am

Big on enjoyment.

Another satisfying meal for Duncan Avocado in one of his many Fruity Islands hangouts. No way he could eat it all. Dog friend Barney was currently barking at some ducks swimming in a pool backed by several waterfalls.

A snake named Matilda lay nearby, as full as Duncan from gorging on a stray duckling. Mother Wanda will be inconsolable for days until her next batch of quackers is born, when she completely forgets about the existence of Little Arnold as babies Pete, Jim Bob, Orange, Tan, Smokey, Lila, and Bertie absorb all of her time.

Recent mother Abbey tells Matilda to stay away from her own brood, and emphasizes that there’s plump, juicy frogs and lizards over in the far corner of the pool. Jack the Mallard just wants to make love to either Wanda or Abbey again. It’s that time for him.

Trojan-Durexian War vet Sam Bee, watching Barney, Wanda, Abbey, Jack and Matilda in turn, has taken up fishing. But also, friend Duncan notices, drinking, a not deadly combination but one to perhaps worry about for later. Better get him into his gorgeous gorge as soon as possible. But Big Island is so peaceful. He wouldn’t mind popping open another brewskie himself. And, in fact, does so.

~~Life~~ death is good.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0012, 0503, Fruity Islands

Tagged as Barney^^, Duncan Avocado^*+%%& deceased, Jack the Mallard^*, Matilda (snake)^^, Paperville+, Sam Bee^*%%, Wanda^^+

February 11, 2019 · 8:16 am

five two

In the large room immediately below Reggie’s bar…

… Axis the Tin Tin Soldier Man and evil sidekick Clubby watch another training film preparing them for the war to come. The wall between The Waste and the other, more savory dimensions is becoming thinner and more ragged. The Bar at the End of Time on the SW corner of Burnt Oak represented just the beginning. Now there was End of Time’s Kob Curtain and his newly acquired taste for meat from The Waste, then cave dweller Tessa’s contact with Fruity Islands… the list goes on and on actually. The antimatter leak at the ruined Church of Extreme Tilers over in Wastoria to name another.

Axis and Clubby knew the walls were slowly closing in on them. And now, so did Jackson Bloch. Thanks to the natives’ lack of understanding about the martial arts. Hand held weapons were the thing around here.

He takes another sip of his rancid beer and contemplates the next step.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0012, 0502, The Waste+

Tagged as Axis/Tropp-Opp/Campbell O'Pine^*++++@, Clubby^*#, Jackson Bloch^*+, Tin Tin (Soldier Man)^*

February 11, 2019 · 7:01 am

five one

He was totally lost. “Vortexville,” he repeated to the zombie looking bartender named Reginald (Reggie).

“Hmm,” Reggie exclaimed. “Lots of places named something like that around here. Vortex, Chaos, Waste this and that. Junk this or another. Toxic, Destitute, Unsavory Lane… Black Hole Village down yonder in the Big Canyon. You’ll have to elaborate more. Who’s in this place? What are some of the residents’ names?”

“I was hired by a Grannie of some kind,” replies the about equally confused builder named Jackson. Jackson Bloch, but no kin to our Baker Bloch. “Or Grannis. Maybe it was Grannis. Or Grannie.”

“*Whose* Granny, then? Don’t know anyone by the name of Granny. Don’t know Vortextra…”

“Vortexville,” Jackson corrected. His left earring glinted. It always did when he felt he was brighter than the person being spoken to at the moment. A character giveaway.

“Maybe Mary will know. Mary’s been around longer than about anyone around these here parts. Lives over in Hambone. I’ll give her a ring. If the telephones are back up.” Reggie retreats behind the bar. Jackson Bloch can hear him speaking to someone. They talk for about 15 minutes. Reggie returns.

“Sorry about that.” We haven’t caught up in a while. Have to be nice to the vampires, you know. They’ll eat you in the middle of the night if not. Mary’s okay, though. And she knows everything.” He pauses, looks at the ceiling.

“Well?” Jackson implored after a minute. “Does she know, er, Grannis? Grannie?” he revolved around again, then held firm with the second. “Grannie… pretty sure.”

“Yeah. I think she does.” Again the pause. Jackson caught on. He visualized how many linden dollars he brought with him on the trip. Just enough to get by. Ruin construction doesn’t bring in the big bucks it use to. He reached into his back pocket, pulled out his wallet, and slipped Reggie a fiver, hoping that would be enough. It was. Reggie knew about the downturn of the ruin construction business as well.

“Yeah, it’s Jethro and Bauer’s place down on the southwest corner of The Fracture. But it’s a fur piece from here. Did you bring any weapons? A lot of people around here frown on outside weapons. They’ll shoot you good and dead just for that. Best to buy from the local traders. You might as well just give me any weapons you brought with you, then. I’ll make sure they get put in the right hands… er, destroyed. Destroyed I meant there.”

His boss didn’t supply him with any weapons. Budget cuts again. But he didn’t want to expose this weakness. Reggie seemed decent enough for a zombie, but this was a tough place with obviously a lot of back stabbing going on. “Just my red belt in karate, ha ha.” He faked a judo stance on the bartender, who didn’t know the difference. “Oh,” he said. “I see. Oh… I hear the phone again. Better go see who it is.”

Jackson Bloch didn’t hear anything. No ringing. Maybe it was all the bling in his ears. The left one blinged for vanity, the right for gluttony. Right now he was getting hungry. His ear told him. No food here, though, unless you like human flesh. And he wasn’t ready to go there yet. Not quite yet. Stay in The Waste long enough and its something you have to contemplate hard and long about. Most succumb. It’s an acquired taste.

Reggie returned to the counter once more. “I had Mary call off her attack on you. Have to be honest and up front with you. No one knows judo or karate around here, or can tell them apart.”

Obviously, thought Jackson. His left ear glinted again.

“You wouldn’t be worth the trouble.” He leaned forward, his putrid breath against Jackson’s neck. “Here’s the deal.”

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0012, 0501, The Waste+

Tagged as Jackson Bloch^*+, Reggie^*

December 8, 2018 · 11:47 am

Teepot’s Jeffrie Phillips

“It really is unfortunate that Duncan had to be treated like that. But t’was a necessary evil to eliminate a competitor. One down, two to go. Maybe one. Horace Wise did his shtick well. Railroaded back to Dixie he was.”

“Treasure – must – be – protected.”

“Exactly, Potty Steve. They must never suspect we were the ones behind it all.”

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0011, 0517, Teepot+

Tagged as Big Baby Jane^^, Ghost Gorilla^*+++^^+++, Jeffrie Phillips^*++, John Bob Denver^*$, Potty Steve^*

December 8, 2018 · 10:41 am

Celebration

“But what will I do without Duncan?” George asks Baker Bloch between sobs.

“You’ll move on son. Forward. But not here.”

“I wish we would have never found that book, that rule.”

“Too late.”

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0011, 0516, The Cross, The Straight

Tagged as Baker Bloch^*+++++@, George^*+, Hidi^^++++=$, Potty Steve^*

December 8, 2018 · 9:45 am

The Cross

Mission accomplished, thought spy Potty Steve while watching another Hidi observe from a smaller island. They only show up when they do.

Duncan A. crosses the bridge.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0011, 0515, The Cross, The Straight

Tagged as Duncan Avocado^*+%%& deceased, Hidi^^++++=$, Potty Steve^*

December 7, 2018 · 5:53 am

Lineside

—–

“They’ll really and truly send you up the river for this one if you don’t cooperate, Duncan. Pin the murders on you one by one. Go down the list, create justifications. Is that what you really want?”

“Of course not. I didn’t kill Ruby!”

“Keep it down, keep it down,” he implored in his cool, grunge voice. “That one we can remake through the leg. Legs are like 11, but, taken apart, 1 apiece. Cloning abilities. But the 12th? Gone.”

“Indigo. Again…!”

“I know — pipe it down. You didn’t do it. Well… that’s the price you pay for being a member of that silly Pot-D. People can use you against your will. You wake up in jail, you wake up in a mortuary, you wake up on a beach, you wake up inside a whale’s mouth. No rhyme nor reason for it. But now there’s a reason. And that’s what *we’re* here for. Pan-Z. Horizontal and vertical are the only directions that will counter diagonal. The Straight is a subsection of The Cross. This is where they meet: this tree lined lane and then the island just beyond. It’s the Mason-Dixon Line all over again. Are you ready to cross into Dixie?”

Duncan glanced over through the cracked rear window of the bus stop. “I do like tree lined roads, granted.”

“Good. Then it’s settled. When you see me again, I won’t look like this.” Then he was gone; winked out.

Duncan thought back to the terrible, horrible revelations Colonel Flagstaff just spoke about on the border of Harrietsville and Arkendale — where The Straight and The Cross supposedly link energies with each other. He could be the 13th. He could be pinned for it all. He could be in the pen forever and ever. He must sign the new contract with a blood filled pen or else: pencil him gone as well.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0011, 0514, Ruby's Empire/Fishers Island, The Cross, The Straight

Tagged as Colonel Flagstaff^*+++$, Duncan Avocado^*+%%& deceased, Indigo^^%, POT-D, Ruby Original^^++++, Ruby^^+++++

December 6, 2018 · 10:07 am

Laffoon 02

“Volcano island, Indigo. That must be Zebrasil.” Ruby paused. “Or is it Ichelus? Anyway, there’s also these 10 women whose disappearance is associated with 2 more sims: Sylvata and, let’s see, Ribeata. According to this ‘Mole Times’ front page article here at least. So we’ve already found stuff.”

“OMG.” First of many. Ruby doesn’t like spiders. Or tentacles.

“Interesting. But what does it mean?” (exploding washer)

“At least it warmed up the place,” groused Indigo. “For a split second.” She shivers again.

—–

End of Laffoon here, Indigo. And please keep up if you will.”

—–

“More passages to the side before the crossover, though.”

“I’m here,” declares Indigo.

Ruby stares at the southward tableau. “Oil leak. Oil well… ink well. Ink leak. Dimensional rift? Let’s go see.”

—–

“UUGH, Indigo. Giant pink frog!”

“I might throw up, Ruby. That stench!”

“And more lockers. Let’s just throw them all open at once this time.”

Indigo moves toward the wall and vomits.

—–

“Sorry about that, Indigo. The santa hat may indicate recent activity, since this is Christmas season. That’s all I’ve got here.”

“Let’s get out of here, then.”

Their attention shifts northward. They walk to the other end of the corridor. Indigo immediately felt better after leaving behind the frog.

—–

“OMG, Ruby. A club. *Casey’s* club.”

“You put that there,” Ruby accused.

“I put that there,” quickly admits Indigo.

“Stop doing that. This is serious.”

“Okay.” Indigo puts on her best “serious” face, making Ruby sigh and shake her head. “*Anyway* we’re moving out of Laffoon again now.” She boldly strides forward through the danger sign…

“More lockers.”

“Big surprise,” asserts Indigo, thinking of some other joke item she could rez.

“A *dead* parrot this time.”

“Another jack pumpkin head and another santa hat (not pictured)… combo of two holidays that don’t mesh well together — I should know. Being Mrs. Claus and all.”

“You are?”

“Yes.”

“Ahh. *Finally* Indigo. The mystery is starting to come into focus. Serial killer! Bible must equal code, as in a code to crack. We’ll take these 2 items with us back to Collagesity.”