Tag Archives: CLYDE++++

ending 01

“Don’t you guys watch anything but MTV?” complained Bill/Wheeler good-naturedly.

“I’m telling you Queen Bill.”

“Bill, please. Or The Bill. Whichever.”

“You were sitting *right* there when you told me we had to move our trailer here to Rubi. Well, not in that chair, but the chair I use to have over in Obscure.”

Bill tested the springs again a little. “Yeah, I’m really sorry about this furniture — we’ll get you a better chair. And the toilet in the living room!

Unacceptable. I’ll get Clyde the town fixit man out here as early as I can. He’s working on the pipes of the Oo’d Church this weekend. But we’ll get him out here asap.”

“The dining room set is nice,” states Angus Nuffin, attempting to paint a brighter picture of their situation than Bill.

“No, this is my responsibility. I’m early in my rulership. I’ll right the wrong.”

“Okay, that’s great Bill. We really appreciate it. Now… back to that night you visited me in Obscure…”

—–

“She just doesn’t remember it,” Angus complains to his daughter Ragdoll later on while sitting at the dining table. “And I don’t know how to jog her memory. She’s new at her job — *I’m* new at this. Indigo can *hypnotize* with the best, but unhypnotizing someone like Bill (he was going to say, “as stubborn as” but decided on “like” here) — not as easy as I, we, supposed.”

Ragdoll listened intently. “Then maybe The Diagonal itself should wake her up. Indigo could take her on a walk in the woods…” She paused, thinking of a better idea. “Or…”

“Obviously, Obscure is no good, since we moved the trailer from there because of the lowered energy.”

Ragdoll remained patient, knowing her beloved father was under a lot of pressure right now to bring back Bill’s memories. “What I was going to say,” she continued in her kind way, “is that we should take her to a particular place on The Diagonal. But not Obscure.”

“Right, right. Sorry I interrupted you there.” Distracted by a sound behind him, Angus looked at the clock. 2:01 in the morning. “We better get some sleep. Looks like Indigo is staying in the woods again tonight. Good for her! I couldn’t ask for 2 more dedicated daughters to the cause. Pot-D forever!”

“Pot-D forever!” echoed Ragdoll almost as enthusiastically.

“Before you turn in, sweetie, let’s take one more look at your brand new alternate self.”

“Okay, but only if you change in turn,” replied Ragdoll sweetly.

“Alright, Zero. On the count of 3, then. 1…2…”

“You look great, Ragdoll.”

“Shirley, please. When I’m in this form.”

“Of course.” Angus/Sid watched Ragdoll/Shirley scratch again. “But we have to give you something for those fleas, birthday girl.”

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Morrison

“You’re back Clyde.”

“Yes, Richard,” answers the pink lady-elephant. “But it’s Bonnie.”

“Where’s Gregg?” asks Richard.

“You mean Stan? He said he was on his way. What are you guys up to tonight?”

“Nothing. Heard you got a new band Clyde.”

Bonnie shakes her head. “*Howard* has a new band. That’s my twin brother. They call themselves Leona, yes. Just rehearsing so far, I’ve heard.”

“Blackstars,” says Ziffie the smaller pink elephant on the bar stool to Richard’s left.

“What was that?” Richard asks down to him.

“The name of the band,” Ziffie explains, “is now Blackstars. I think it’s a David Bowie tribute band, but Garson sued and put them in their place.”

“Who’s Garson?” asked the man in the scary rabbit costume.

“Former Bowie keyboardist. ‘Alladin Sane’, ‘Outside’… list goes on.”

“But mainly ‘Alladin Sane’,” pipes up Ziffie again.

“Yes,” agrees Bonnie. “More the (title) song and not the album.”

“Improvisor,” inserts Ziffie.

“Right you are, cousin. Three time’s the charm.”

Stan comes strolling into the cafe.

“What’s up homies?”

“Blackstars,” says Bonnie.

“Blackstars,” Ziffie quickly follows.

Bonnie and Ziffie stare at Richard, pressuring him. He relents. “Hmmm. Blackstars I suppose.”

“Cool. Let’s you and me, Richard, go see the new crop of dead people over at Pervimus’ Gathering Bar.”

Instead of answering, Richard goes up and smells Stan. “That a new perfume, honey?”

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