00460403

“So you see, the giant blue cryptid turned out to be a really big human with blue painted toenails. Uncovering this, I hightailed it out of there via the rope I came down on because, you know, they were still *Big Feet*. Case closed. I file that one under Solved like all the rest of its kind.

“And so, Ms. Brown, I can tackle any case like that, debunk it in, say, 3 days tops. Like yours. What was it, underwater sighting in that tunnel over in the inland sea? 2 days for that. First off, it was probably a costume, probably someone you even know. Who reported this to you?”

“Well, um. My brother actually. He’s a, er, shapeshifter himself.”

“Shapeshifter, phtt,” Roberts dismissed the word outright. “No such thing.”

“I’ve seen him — it.”

“People see many things and interpret it their own way. The planet Venus becomes a UFO, The Moon turns into the face of a vanilla rapist hiding behind some trees. It goes on and on. I hate to be the one to burst your bubble–.”

“About Bigfoot, then,” hastens Charlene, having to get back to the records store by 3 when assistant Devon’s shift is over. “The Nawt Vaya one.”

“Ah, Nawt Vaya,” Roberts mouths the location. “Forgot the name for it. Clever.” She thought of Alamo and Arizona, smelly, salty inland sea transmuted to clean, freshwater one. Probably worth it despite the lowering of resolution.

“How much to, er, find out the truth?”

Roberts thinks of Wanda’s boat that must remain afloat, along with the business itself. Cases were kind of coming in slower than usual right now because of the aftermath of the flood. She reviews what Charlene Brown has told her. She runs a records store in a place called The Burg. Doesn’t sound like much money in that. But before, she says she worked as an adjunct faculty member of a local university. Studying cryptids of all things. Her research parallels some of mine. No real proof for any of it. She’s thinking about making a film of the subject to reenter the field, mostly emphasizing the debunking, throw in some loose ends here and there. Loose ends, she would admit if pressed, that she too has about the existence of bigfoot. Could this particular one — represent a loose end? After all, Charlene is pretty seasoned on the subject. In all likelihood not, but…

“No charge,” Roberts decides, making Charlene crack a smile. She’d have to sell a lot of records to level up to her standard fees, Roberts thinks. But the movie — she could ask for a role in it, recoup the cost that way and then some; help emphasize the debunking aspect as most paying customers would expect; help organize the financial backing along those lines. “Now: tell me more about this film.”

(to be continued)

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00460402

“Is this Roberts?” says Charlene, knowing it wasn’t but saying it anyway. Just to kill some time.

“No that’s just another dead body; girl named Time. Over here,” Wanda instead directs Charlene’s attention while still looking out across the room from that perch on the giant vanity table. “Those shoes. That’s you!”

“Me?” Pink high heeled shoes, Charlene observes under the distant bed again. And a blue body stretched out and strapped in up top. Disturbing!

“Oh. Right,” backtracks Wanda once more. “That’s someone else. I keep forgetting.”

“O–kay. But *Roberts*,” Charlene tries to focus the queer, young receptionist. “Where’s the private investigator I came to see? I’ll take Franklin too, mind you. If she’s closer or more available.”

“Roberts is good. Roberts is *there*. Big Feet (!).”

Wanda doesn’t move, but suddenly they were there.

—–

“Ms. Brown. Ms. *Brown*. Slap her again,” commands Roberts from above, fresh from a case. So Wanda does.

I fully come around, sit up from my stretched out if not strapped in position on the floor by the door. I hear Roberts tell Wanda to return to her desk, job done.

“I must have, ow!, tripped over the bow of that boat.”

“What boat?” Roberts says, not even looking around for one. “Never mind. Get up when you feel like it and come into my office. We have many things to talk about.”

“We do?” I said, still aching, still recovering.

“Yes.”

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00460401

Another one looking for Roberts and Franklin, Officer Buford thinks, trying to distract himself from the carnage behind him. He can tell because she doesn’t seem to know her way around. Only regulars use the asylum, and noone goes downtown unless there’s legal or other problems or maybe to fix their car at Ben’s. This one doesn’t have a car. This one has some kind of legal or other problems, he’s determined by process of elimination. And so it is.

—–

She finally finds the right teleport spot and then walks over to the office, stepping inside.

“You!” says the receptionist, thinking she recognizes her either from print or film, reader’s choice. Probably print, though. Because of the not knowing the location here.

“Oh. Never mind,” the receptionist backtracks the reaction. “You’re not her. Can I help you, then?”

“I’m looking for Franklin,” Charlene The Punk Brown begins, taking all the oddness in stride. “Or Roberts — let’s make it Roberts,” she decides.

“Big House,” says Wanda (Wanda again?). “Investigating a Big Foot sighting.”

“Exactly why I’m here.”

“Not surprising,” Wanda quickly replies. “It will be a debunking, mind you. They always are. I’m just trying to save you some money up front. We have enough guillible people coming through here to keep my boat afloat.”

“Wondering about that.”

“You get use to it,” she says about the boat that keeps her afloat.

“Riiight, so… just use the teleporter outside again? One of the selections?”

“I’ll take you. I need to get out of here for a while anyway.” And so she did.

—–

Not so big, thinks Charlene, being behind Wanda a bit due to not quite getting the hang of these wonky teleporters still, pheh. But then she opened the front door to the house.

“Up here!!” Wanda calls from quite a far distance, quite a far distance indeed.

20 minutes later she was there after climbing up a rope from a trash bin.

(to be continued)

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00460317

Wheeler started to sit down beside Charlene and Emily in back but Willa Brown Halter instead waved her up front. She didn’t want the newly minted mayor to be seen with a *Downtown* Brown, hmph. Besides, she was up next. After Wolvie’s sentencing was over.

“What happened Madam Mayor?” Willa asked about her delay after she sat down beside her.

“Well, we fell in a plot hole,” Wheeler started another prepared joke. “Did I say plot hole? *Pot* hole I meant, as in one of Builder Bob’s diggings.” She glanced at him in the next bench over with his pipe still on shoulder.

“Funny,” said Willa. “But you’ve actually stumbled into your subject matter for the day. Infrastructure.” Funny indeed.

Then at the main stage:

“So,” said Judge Tronesisia (hi Tronesisia!). “You’re telling me, with your *bigfoot* costume on right now which you were caught in, that you didn’t put on this same costume and walk perpendicular through the Nawt Vaya tunnel walls while you also photographed yourself doing the same?”

“That’s right, my liege.”

“We have the photograph, I’ll remind you. *Proof*.”

No answer.

“Last chance to plead guilty,” warned Tronesisia.

Wolvie kept silent. As was his plan all along.

“What gives?” whispered Wheeler to Willa in the pause.

“Oh, this will wrap up soon enough,” Willa dismissed the whole hearing. “Just some *Downtowner* caught with his pants down again, ha.”

“Then I have no choice but to sentence you to *3 years*…” Gasps all around.

“… probationary work,” finished the judge, making another juicy dangler. Sighs all around now. Everyone seemed to like Wolvie and didn’t want any lengthy imprisonment to befall him. He was just trying to help out his kind, most thought. “You’ll tell kids about bigfoot,” Tronesisia further decreed, “maybe even participate in that film your sister Charlene The Punk Brown is making deriding the subject.” Charlene gives the judge a thumbs up from the back, just as happy as Willa was disappointed. Pants down, the latter thinks. Downtowner! How could they ignore the facts!

Wolvie leaves the courthouse room pants head down. But it was all play. He dare not look at the smile on his sister’s face lest he break out a big one too.

“Okay, Wheeler,” urged Willa. “You’re up. Get over there before the townspeople and belt out your plan to fix *infrastructure*.” Bob was so excited about the topic that he shifted his pipe from left to right shoulder. No more fun with holes, he thought punnily. Funds *for*.

“Aheemm,” she begins nervously, eyeing expectant Bob with his 12 foot pipe. “This is what I have in mind.”

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0046, 0317, Jeogeot, Nawt Vaya, South Lake, The Burg

00460316 (reversed course)

Charlene saw her coming up from Downtown and recognized her — like Wolvie before — from that maid cleaning video also available in Emily’s store. Despite the different hair. What gives?? she thinks, and stops in her tracks to find out as best she could.

“Wheeler, I gather,” she began. “The new town mayor.”

“Charlene The Punk,” said Wheeler, also guessing the identity of the person before her. Not a video this time, but print. She spotted the blue fingers left by the Ball.

“Where are you going?”

“What do you mean? I’m coming to see you.”

“I *mean*, the town meeting is in 15 minutes — I didn’t mean, come see me now, pheh. I was heading there myself. *You’re* suppose to be the leader of the thing. Not a new town name this time like for the first, but perhaps something even more important. And directly following up on the first.”

“Weelll?” said expectant Wheeler after a significant enough pause. Stop with the danglings and parts 01 of 02 and the to-be-continued and shite, she thinks.  Then she spotted other Downtowners moving Uptown too, understood that Charlene was telling truth.

“Just follow me,” Charlene said, and proceeded past Wheeler. “I’ll take control,” she hurled back. “*Maid*.” A now completely floored Wheeler didn’t think she had any choice; Charlene knew too much. And Wolvie! She picks herself up off the slanted Midtown pavement and moves back toward Uptown’s Town or City Hall like all the rest.

(to be continued)

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0046, 0316, Jeogeot, The Burg

00460315

Wheeler first heard the term Blue Balls while on the toilet reading about it in a conveniently placed local history mag. Being an excellent writer because of all those professor papers, Charlene “The Punk” Brown had no problem getting an article published — with permission from her sometimes lover and owner of the actual (tape) object Emily New Moon of course. As it turns out, the name originates from the Blue Balls Hotel, built more than two hundred years ago and which stood on the southwestern corner of town, right where the ice cream vendor Newt and she were eating at just several days back. Make that several weeks back as I’m checking. The builder, John Wallace — by chance the father of Builder Bob often noisily working on those pipes just outside Emily’s video store to her irritation — hung a blue ball out front, calling it “The Sign of the Blue Ball”. Locals soon began calling the town Blue Ball after the inn, which soon turned into Blue Balls as another ball was added to the first when no one was looking or paying attention.

But wait there’s more. The town’s name has a suggestive second meaning according to the 2nd paragraph of that article, identical to the slang term “blue balls,” which refers to, according to Charlene’s text, “the sexual condition of temporary testicular and prostate fluid congestion due to prolonged and unsatisfied sexual excitement.” After an initial leak by Marg “The Town” Gossiper, word spread quickly. A town meeting was speedily organized, a new name demanded. “Well, if not Blue Balls, then what!?” George “The Grill” Foreman called from in back of the rowdy, crowded room on the second floor of what soon became the town hall building, prompting mumblings of “What are we going to call this burg?” all around. No one could come up with a replacement name. And thus they settled on The Burg for lack of creativity or any other option. “Call it what it is,” finished Tom “The Surface” Smith. Oh, and then they all went over and burned down John Wallace’s Blue Balls hotel along with its offensive sign to seal the deal.

Wait! More (3rd paragraph). Left in the ashes of the catastrophe was a fireproof safe holding the most valuable of John’s valuables (he had many). And in that safe amongst diamonds and rubies and gold bars and gold bonds and the like was found the actual reason for the establishment’s appellation, a sex tape to be short, starring a young, novice actress in the field soon to become a much much bigger name in another. “And the name of that young actress,” Charlene finished part 01 of her promised 2 part article, “is none other than, get ready! (to be continued)”

*Fascinating* read, *friend*, Wheeler sarcastically and playfully thought about the cliffhanger while putting down the mag beside the toilet and finishing her business here. Now to get over to town hall and see what she’s facing in her 1st day of managing this here crazy town… *burg*!

But the subject would not go away, hmph. An envelope labeled “Paradise Found?” with a map of a certain Pennsylvania county all marked up inside laid atop the mail heaped up on her desk that morning, big pile courtesy of outgoing and not-giving-a-damn-on-her-last-day Electra. Sent by Charlene of all people. “Come see me,” indicated a handwritten note also within, along with the address of her records store down in Downtown (this was Uptown). Like Wheeler didn’t know that bit of information already, ha. And so on what she planned to be at least a 2 hr. 1st day lunch break that’s exactly what she did.

Blue Ball here on the map and not yet Blue Balls, you’ll notice. That might be a key — we’ll see.

(to be continued)

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00460314

They put her up in a motel across from City Hall where she’d be working most of the time. She took Electra’s room, who, being the former mayor of this here burg, had left the scene for parts unknown, perhaps back to her original home in the Sansara continent’s snowy region. She left behind an assortment of, here, little used shawls, coats, and toboggans in this much more temperate climate of middle southern Jeogeot, so hasty she was to get out of town. Disgraced (!). She didn’t even say goodbye to her kids Wolvie (originally: Bert) and Charlene, since she hadn’t been on real speaking terms with them since they started dating the same person. Wolvie she wasn’t as mad at. But *Charlene* — how dare she date a another girl. Now it became really dirty, this threesome. She wondered if they did it that way — all 3 together I mean. Emily had enough such tapes at her disposal that they could get ideas. In fact as she was thinking about it she’d bet money on it, perhaps up to 10.

Back to Wheeler and the present. We’ll deal with Electra and the consequences of leaving her children behind later. Right now there was only a bed in her room, a small dresser, a Gustav Klimt painting print called “The Dancer” from his late period, and that’s it. She logically wondered about closet space for her many clothes she’d recently bought on the marketplace, discount mind you, because you can find so many cheap there, especially older models (she doesn’t mind retro; thinks it’s got a strong future). Not living in the shadow of her locked-in-childhood looks daughter, she can experiment, mix and match blouses, skirts, and shoes and such. She’s kind of living the life, come to think of it. And all this mayor stuff is just for play. She’ll invite Newt over as soon as she fixes up the room to her standards. And then perhaps think about a larger occupancy for the both of them. If it comes to that. 1st “proper” date tomorrow beyond just the marriage and attached rendezvouses. Not ice cream this time but an actual meal in an actual, pretty upscale restaurant. More details very soon.

(to be continued)

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0046, 0314, Jeogeot, The Burg

00460313

She thought she’d go back to the beginning of the road, where she started her story in this here Burg of the general Nawt Vaya region of the Jeogeot continent of the Western Hemisphere of virtual Our Second Lyfe. A call, I believe. No, perhaps a calling, as in a profession. She was always bright, super bright in fact. The unusual drew her attention. Cryptozoology was eventually the chosen study. She’d be a professor, occasionally publish articles and present papers and have a rather easy life of it as more a skeptic on the subject than a believer per common public opinion. Then the call — yes, a call was also involved, as in phone. Someone dialed all the numbers except 4, which would instead connect you to The Moon. “Hallo?” she said from her faculty desk next to the faculty lounge whose thin walls enabled her to keep up with all the local faculty gossip. Dr. Brown dating Dr. Green to the chagrin of Dr. Blue? All in a day’s listening.

“It’s me. Wolvie.”

“*Wolvie*. You old dog. Hadn’t heard from you since–”

“Lester’s Bay, I know. I ran away, sorry.”

“You ran away as a *dog*. Dude, what gives?”

“I’m… not who I seem.”

“I *gathered*.”

“Anyway. Charlene. I need some help. Something in your department.”

“Tell me about it, bro of mine.” She knew it was one of those loose ends in her life that eventually had to be tied up. Her own flesh and blood brother a shapeshifter! But academia called and she put such psychic phenomena out of her mind. She had grades to worry about, peer pressure, etc. She was young in her position, with tenure a fur piece down the road.

“Bigfoot,” he just blurted the name out, which he knew would catch her attention. “Sighted in your vicinity.”

Her vicinity, let’s see. Yes I guess this would have to be Nawt Vaya State University, then, hmm. Interesting. Perhaps a strong Psychics department. Or maybe that’s Physics. Anyway, the link had been made, the one between Charlene and Wolvie her brother, not Psychics and Physics. Although maybe that fits in too.

“Give me a location,” she cited rather mechanically, more a professor’s standard tone in this dog eat dog world of general college academia, especially for a female professor who, by default, had more to prove.

He did more than that. He sent her a picture. “Bigfoot!” she cried aloud, giving Dr. Black a start from his faculty lounge chair just beyond the wall. “So it’s real.” And just down the road from her in that Nawt Vaya underwater tunnel, she observed.

She understandably took the rest of the day off to investigate. Which eventually landed her on the doorstep of Roberts and Franklin in one of those 2 locations shown before, just as Wolvie planned. Charlene would do the choosing for him, as it turned out. Should have seen it coming.

(to be continued)

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0046, 0313, Jeogeot, Juho, Nawt Vaya, South Lake, The Burg

00460312

“There she is, Emily. The new mayor.”

“*Not* the same as the old mayor,” replied Emily, trying not to look behind her. It was hard. And what was all that butterfly, um, *gear* she was wearing? But it was just all part of her power. She couldn’t help asking aloud, though. She leans over, and says not far above a whisper: “Butterflies?”

“All part of the power; perks of the job,” responded Charlene. Knew it.

“Who would *want* that?” Still leaning, still just above a whisper.

“I hear ya. But…” she decides to say since they were leaning in to each other, being more secretive. “What about Wolvie?”

“What *about* Wolvie?” Emily says.

“You know, because he’s, ahem, the mayor’s son. Like I’m the mayor’s daughter. *Old* mayor. And *Shelley*.”

“Shelley’s not in this story,” shot back Emily New Moon, tired of hearing about the old. New is the thing now. And Wheeler fits right in, she thinks. She’s tired of the mother-daughter-son talk, the Unholy Triangle. Speaking of which…

—–

“I wish, Edward, that you’d be more sympathetic to my plight. I’m *married*.” Edward, her Ed, was in danger of fading away himself under her new butterfly power and he knew it. Wheeler had to disappear in order for him to even been seen atall in this setting. He had no other choice than to wait in the background, biding his time. At the backwards flowing waterfall.

(to be continued)

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0046, 0312, Jeogeot, Nawt Vaya, South Lake, The Burg

00460311 (3Ms)

“Are we keeping you up, Ms. Wilson?”

“Oh. *Sorry*.” Wheeler quickly moved her feet off the table, sat up straight. She realized she’d made perhaps a grave mistake falling asleep at the employment assessment meeting here in The Burg. But it was all part of the play, the fun and games. None of this really mattered except *as* in a play. “I’ve been, ahem, sleeping in my car lately,” she tried to excuse her pretend drowsiness. “After I left my last job.”

“And, let’s see, that’s as a maid, I see. Interesting job description. All sorts of tasks — laundering, ironing, vacuuming, window cleaning, in a, quote unquote, semi-aquatic setting? Can you explain further?”

Yes, it was a skybox partially filled with water. My 2 feet were always wet, she started the joke she’d prepared beforehand. Make that 3-4 feet since the water went that high, ha ha.”

Wanda Wilma Willa Brown Halter didn’t laugh or even smile. “I’ll just add to my notes: owner fetish,” which Wheeler knew would be pretty correct. She knew she was always being looked over. “So… why did you choose The Burg to come to after this, Ms. Wilson? Your old job was in the upper east central lower part of Nautilus, which is a virtual hemisphere away from here.”

“I have a friend here,” she lied or pretended. “Charlene Brown, er, just Charlene Brown. You may even be related. I couldn’t help noticing your Brown middle name on your card.”

“Charlene Brown and I are *not* related,” she returned quite firmly. Charlene was Downtown, she (Willa): Uptown. The two sets of townspeople which include the two sets of Browns try not to mix. Clean and Dirty was another way she thought of them. Ms. Wilson here, she thinks, seems to fall into the Downtown category too despite the maid cleaning background. She’d deduced, correctly, there was a dirty aspect to that too. Friends with Charlene who’s also friends with fellow Downtowner Emily New Moon the smut store manager — that also fits. Sounds like the pay was for *show*.

And this time, she did crack a smile. She thought of Wheeler Wilson’s leg tattoos as well, the blue and red fish making their way up the right one to who knows where. She imagines a homecoming fish bowl for the 2 on her stomach for some reason. Reinforcement of The Core.

The meeting ended with Willa determining the only job Wheeler was qualified for was the just vacated mayor’s position, highest actually being lowest in this here Burg. Straightening her hem so you couldn’t follow her fish too high, she sat up and (reluctantly?) shook Willa’s hand to seal the deal. Mayor Wheeler Malone Wilson she is. Again.

(to be continued)

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0046, 0311, Jeogeot, Nautilus, The Burg, Upper Austra^