Tag Archives: David Jaspers^*

the difference between Jaspers and Adgatetown remains opaque

“You know she left town more because of me,” spoke Linda Halsey earnestly to new beau David Newton Jaspers. They were standing on the East Bridge of Adgatetown, the only place they’d ever known or ever would know. Narrow perspective. “I hate to put you down, put you in your place.”

“Wanna listen to some more Chalcedony tonight? I downloaded it from a pirate site. It’s before Dyslexia Cornfield the drummer left. Good stuff.” He pauses, considering. “What were you saying?”

“Never mind.” She takes his arm and dreams about blue tomorrows.

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Red? ¡Ay, caramba!

Funny how I’ve been banned for 30 minutes from that central property, just for sitting at that table and attempting to grab an orange. Better send replacement Snoupy in for a shot instead. Must – get – oranges!

He checks his watch. *Or*, I could just wait the now 19 minutes remaining and explore some of the rest of this Adgatetown. David Jaspers, Linda Halsey — wonder if they’re still here. And of course Lisa V., the real reason for the visit. Bartholomew. I know where he is. I know where all the Smipsons are: Homer, Marg, Grandpaw, Magee, even the aunts Selma and Louise. I know who shot Mr. J. R. Burns. And I know why Lisa can’t find any of them. She has evolved.

Two kids playing on a jungle gym linked together with red, blue, yellow pentagons. Wait: there’s green there too. Sometimes that is forgotten in the mix of primary colors.

Maybe like Lisa and Bartholomew when they were children. Innocent days of youth. Before the Big Change. One made it through the waterfall, the other didn’t. Lisa casts a shadow and evil is born. Projected onto the boy.

They are acting out a play: The boy dreams of life on an elephant, but can’t make it there himself. For the girl: smooth sailing.

What game are they playing now? The one where blue wins and red loses? That happens all the time.

What about yellow on the edge? Oh, there’s the father or guardian showing up. Perhaps come to gather them up and take them home to a nice, delicious warm meal prepared by the significant other while he was out hard at work selling encyclopedias or something. Nice suit.

But when Marion Harding also stopped at the edge of the circle, only one child was still within. The dancing one. The one who cast the shadow.

Oops. Past time to take a pic with those oranges!

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locations

A mysterious object appears along The Diagonal at 193/195 Miata. Oscar the cat is *very* curious about what’s inside.

Once again, Golden Jim knows more than he’s letting on.


“Curse you Red Baron!”

—–

“Gonna be a cold one tonight, Bendy. But you make a great stove — quite toasty.”

“Thank you. I try.”

Fisher thinks this could be one of those nights he also employs Bendy for that other thing they don’t talk about much. Sure wish Lisa V. was here, he laments. I wonder how she is — way over there on the Corsica continent in her big ol’ houseboat. *Alone* hopefully.

—-

Lisa the Vegetarian Smipson just found out about David Jaspers and her best friend Linda Halsey. That’s *it*, she steams. I’m leaving this stupid cartoon town and *never* coming back!

—–

Madame Silver’s yellow figure is stuck no more, thanks to the fix by recently promoted Doll Pedlar Inc. employee Herbert Dune.


“Ah hahahahah! Got you!”

However, he appears to be in the doghouse with her tonight…

… but it’s actually just another, larger dollhouse they’re testing out.

She’s done with him for now. He knows this ensures another sale, though. Rich rich rich, up up up!

—–

A mysterious stranger appears in Adgatetown knowing the whereabouts of Lisa’s missing brother Bartholomew.

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juicy info

“I produced this album back in the early 00’s, one of my first gigs! Progressive math rock band called Chalcedony! Aren’t they just the dreamiest!?”

“I suppose, David! My legs kind of hurt now! Can we go to the juicebar!”

“In a minute, doll! Here’s a passage I always play on air guitar! Dig this!”

“Oh Lord,” Lisa said just below the level of the blaring music. “Will this night never end?”

—–

Morning came. Was Lisa the Vegetarian Smipson still there?

What do you think?

——

“I tell you, Linda. I have half a notion just to sail over to New Island and grab Fisher and plant a big wet one on him and then drag him back here, full painting in tow of course.” She took another drag off her limeaid.

“1000000 lindens?”, fellow vegetarian Linda Halsey guessed at the price once more. “1000500?” Her estimates had been steadily increasing all morning while Lisa continued shaking her head. As the sun rose, so did the worth. She was slightly perspiring now, so excited she was about the possibilities. “*I* could be your lover, Lisa, for all that dough.”

“It’s the paint,” Lisa then explained. “The red half of the violin was painted with a mixture of powdered pigment, rabbit skin glue, and blood. But particular blood. That of the maker’s wife who died in childbirth.”

“You don’t say…”

“And about the green side — even weirder. But I can’t talk about that right now.”

“I know!” her bright, blonde friend then exclaimed. “Vulcan!”

Dang, thought Lisa. She’d said too much.

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elephants

Artist, actor, producer David Newton Jaspers ponders his future in Adgatetown and sees it is good.

Except for one, glaring omission. He doesn’t have a significant other. David believes that’s about to change, what with his good looks, charms, and wiles.

He’s got his eyes on a yellow girl who recently sailed in from New Island over at what they call the Omega continent. But he presently can’t see her…

… if only because of the interceding Linden plumeria bush.

Despite coming from afar, she’s actually Corsican through and through. He likes that about her. He wants to be the same. David Jaspers. A man who can’t possibly lose. Until he does.

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