Tag Archives: Zoidboro^*+$

February 20, 2019 · 8:34 am

Serenity

If she sits in her compression chair too much longer, she may never get up.

So tightly wound around. Like a Mummy.

Only Monsieur’s visits brings her out of herself. Where *is* he??

—–

“I’ve been waiting and waiting for you, Herbert Glenn Gold.”

The full name, he thinks. She *was* upset. “I’m sorry. I’ve been busy with the king. And then with the doll houses. We found Carrcassonnee inside. The one eyed entity that use to rule Collagesity. HF showed us.”

“But you were both Gold and Platinum inside Murdock’s Castle. Time was all mixed up. *Is* mixed up. You came too close to the truth.”

“Now I know. Fingerprince. I just had to find the second dollhouse to confirm it. And the second HF.”

“Are you going inside? Forever and ever and ever?”

“I’m not sure. What would you advise?”

She paused. “Maybe we should go to the Serenity Church. Perhaps the Reverend can help us.”

—–

“He’s *here*. Zoidboro is here.” Monsieur Gold was incredulous.

“Yes,” spoke Parasol below the tone of Zoidboro’s preaching. “It’s because of the Gold and Platinum mix-up. Zoidboro’s been here for years now. Yet he has just arrived. And then: he isn’t here yet. Some realities he was never born, never had a child by that strange mutant gal-guy Patrick Starr.”

“The drummer?”

“No, that’s Ingor.”

“Ingo?”

“No. *He’s* different.”

“My head hurts. I need to sit down.”

—–

So they sat down opposite Sally Spark O Naut — who had dutifully followed Zoidboro through the ~~eyeball~~ cave portal — and listened to the remainder of a beautiful sermon about the dangers of shark attacks. Afterwards, Herbert Gold’s head hurt considerably more.

In fact, I think he died there. Again.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0012, 0602, Rose Heaven^^

Tagged as Herbert (Mssr.) Gold^*+++, Mr. Platinum^*+$, Parasol^^++++%%, Sally Spark O Naut^^+#, Zoidboro^*+$

February 15, 2019 · 9:51 am

Burnt

50 days, thought Sally the Spark O Naut (Sparky) at the old Tiler’s Church in North Yd. Time to finally give up on the Reverend and head home.

But upon reaching the plateau above the decrepit town, Sparky found her service station had disappeared in the meantime, along with perpetually wind blown Raphaelia and her orange cat. Only the wind left.

She’d have to ask the other Sally on the opposite side of the Death Bowl for information. Aka: Lying Widow.

It was the only logical thing to do.

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Tagged as Lying Widow/Sally^^, Sally Spark O Naut^^+#, Zoidboro^*+$

February 13, 2019 · 8:25 am

church (Eotia Village)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sherwood_Anderson

Four[5] or five[6] years were spent in Caledonia, years which formed Anderson’s earliest memories. This period later inspired his semi-autobiographical novel Tar: A Midwest Childhood (1926).[7] In Caledonia Anderson’s father began drinking excessively, which led to financial difficulties, eventually causing the family to leave the town.[7]

“That’s an interesting story, Zoidboro. But I thought it was Caledon.”

Again with the smarts, Zoidboro ponders. What was it now, 8 1/2 months? 8 3/4ths? Better get to the caves asap. “Cale*don*ia,” he emphasizes to his pregnant male friend. “It would be Caledon if told from their perspective, but this is through the eyes of Rosehaven. The Princess ruler, to be specific. Soon to be Queen now that the father is dead. And the mother remains in her grave.”

“So…,” Patrick Starr tries to reason, “… Caledon, I mean, *Rosehaven* is way over here.” He moves his right hand far to the right. “And The Waste, *our* home, is way over here.” The left hand goes more left.

“But brought together by the Oracle,” states Zoidboro, shifting slightly on the bed to peer at the strangely colored 8 ball in the middle of the table to one side. “Tiger,” he completes, noting the residual “stripes”.

“I suppose.” Patrick retracts both hands, sits up, and holds his bloated stomach. “Oh, I felt a kick!”

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0012, 0507, Caledonia^^, End of Time^^

Tagged as 8 1/2, Patrick Starr^^^*, TIGERS, Zoidboro^*+$

January 18, 2019 · 7:54 am

here’s the deal

“These fries smell a little off, Patrick.”

“Whadda you expect for free food, Zoidboro,” spoke the human across him more wisely than usual. He turns in his seat and peers at the stage. “When’s the band start here?”

“Oh, they’ll kick us hobos out long before the music begins, Pat. These are top dollar seats here!”

“Oh.” He then looks to his left. “So the Doc and his lady friends are just the first to arrive, huh.”

“Of course. Frozen Meat Waffles. A very popular band in Eotia Village, perhaps the most popular. We bought that ‘Human Flesh Zone’ CD back when we first arrived. Remember? Now I wish I had that money for some food, clothes, anything.”

“We can sell it.”

Zoidboro waves off Patrick’s again wise suggestion. “Ahh, I actually listened to it a couple of times while you were out on your walks. Knew you wouldn’t be interested. But it’s used goods now.”

“Still…”

“Nah. 5 (dollars) at best for a half dozen times played CD.”

“That’s a fresh Big Mike.” He glances down at the stale hamburger in front of him. “And a sloshie and some proper fries. This is the place to do it.”

Zoidboro wonders along with us, the readers, how Patrick suddenly became so wise. Then he realized: pregnancy. Coming to term. He was basically thinking for two now. And the baby must be smarter than he. Interesting. *I’m* smarter than he. More proof? He must induce that dream of Nevermore again. Or was it Nevermind?

The first band member to arrive sasheys through the front door.

By golly it’s Colonel Flagstaff. In a new disguise. Well, the same disguise we last saw him using over on the Omega continent, but in a quite different setting. And peddling a quite different commodity this time.

He approaches the pair in the booth; speaks in his cool, grunge voice.

“Used CD? Sell? I’ll buy it from you for a dream.”

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Tagged as Cheese Clown^^+#, Colonel Flagstaff^*++++$, Dr. Brown^*++$, Patrick Starr^^^*, Stitches/Ted^^+^*+#, Treelor^^+, Zoidboro^*+$

January 11, 2019 · 9:36 am

hotel (Eotia Village)

“Full occupancy still, Pat. Guess that goes along with it being free and all. Looks like we might have to stay in the caves.”

“I’m not having my baby in a cave!” Pat implored.

And Zoidboro heard her, er, him. It might be his baby too after all. He’d have to think about that possible angle more.

Nevermore.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0012, 0209, End of Time^^, The Waste^^

Tagged as Hidi^^+=$, NODAL, Patrick Starr^^^*, Zoidboro^*+$

January 6, 2019 · 9:03 am

clinic (Eotia Village)

“*Axis*, Zoidboro. That’s who *we’re* trying to defeat. We must make sure we don’t get this VD person to help us. Let’s see, V could stand for Val, Valerie, Valentine…”

“It’s *not* someone’s initials, Pat. Stop looking around. And don’t touch *anything* you don’t have to. Let’s just get you checked up and get outta here.”

After a pause, Pat whispers in Zoidboro’s ear. “I wonder if *he’s* hiding out from Axis too,” indicating the man sitting on the far seat from them.

“Stop — with the Axis talk,” Zoidboro reprimands out of the side of his tentacle covered mouth.

“Patrick!?” a suddenly appearing nurse shrills, making them both jump a bit.

“Um, that’s me.” Pat raises his hand. Zoidboro grabs it and shoves it back down.

“Right this way sir.” She looks at Zoidboro. “Are you his… guardian?”

“Yeah, we can go with that,” Zoidboro grumbles, and gets up to follow.

—–

“Say you come from a, quote unquote, mutanty place, huh?”

“Hambone, sir. That’s right. Zoidboro here lives in North Yd…”

“… but part of the same micro-continent,” Zoidboro further explained.

“Hmmm…” Doctor Brown taps his pen crisply against the report several times. “Well, sorry to break this to you Patrick — *Pat* — but it looks like you’re pregnant. 8 months so, in fact.” He stares at the dumbfounded Patrick, then at Zoidboro. “I, um, don’t reckon you’re the father?”

“N-n-no. No!”

But was he?

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Tagged as Dr. Brown^*++$, Patrick Starr^^^*, Zoidboro^*+$

January 4, 2019 · 7:09 am

missing

I’ve looked everywhere on God’s beige earth for them. But I’m not going down there to North Yd to check. Not after what I saw last year with Tessa. Gold to Platinum.

Better head back home in the narrow boat-plane. Maybe refuel first over at Sparky’s since it’s nearby.

—–

Ooops! Knocked over a couple of gas pumps again. Oh well. Nothing scars this old babe. Except that cursed dune of April Mae’s. Must be some kind of magic dune, and in the wrong way, hmph. Probably some voodoo connected to the aberrant Omega continent itself. “Sparky!” Monsieur Gold calls through the station’s open door while honking his horn. “Sparky! It’s happened again!”

Now where is *she*?

“Zoidboro!” cries little Raphaelia Jenkinson from a nearby garage bay, flickering merrily in her red dress beside similarly wind-blow, yellow cat Ziggy Dustbowl. “Zoidboro!” she repeats.

In the basin immediately below…

… Sally the Spark O Naut (“Sparky”) has waited a long time for Reverend Zoidboro to start preaching. Two days, in fact, since this is Tuesday. But she’s decked up in her Sunday best and dearly hates to needlessly change clothes.

5 more minutes, she thinks. Maybe 5 hours.

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Tagged as Herbert (Mssr.) Gold^*+++, Raphaelia Jenkinson^^, Sally Spark O Naut^^+#, Zoidboro^*+$

January 2, 2019 · 7:27 am

The Bar at the End of Time 02

“Says it’s right here,” the demonic card creature slurped. “But I don’t see’s no bar.”

“Coordinates don’t lie, Clubby. Let’s proceed forward. With caution.”

—–

“Another level below us, Clubby. Looks like we’ll have to jump this time. How are your knees?”

“They’ll have’s to do.”

—–

“How you feel?” asked a truly concerned Axis after the leap. Clubby was his right hand man in all things demonic. He dare not have him out of action for any length of time.

“Been better.”

“Well. We’ll get you some knee braces when we get back to base.”

“Okay’s.”

“That could be it down there, Clubby. Wouldn’t you say that would be about right under where we were?”

“Sure’s.”

“What did I tell you about the misplaced plurals, Clubby,” Axis finally scolded. “We have to prepare for the *big* leap. The ‘going outside’. You can’t *talk’s* like that out there.”

“Okay’s.”

Axis then figuratively bore another hole through him with a riveting stare.

“‘Okay,’ I mean,” the evil Clubby acquiesced.

“Good.” Axis looked down the corridor again. “Let’s go ahead and turn invisible at this point. I know it will be a drain on our energy, but we probably shouldn’t take any chances in case of ambush.”

“I double checked,” Clubby held firm. “No ambush.”

“But you didn’t *triple* check.”

Clubby backed down again. “No,” he admitted.

“True soldiers — warriors — always triple check, Clubby. At a minimum.”

“Alright.”

“We’ll move into invisibility mode… now.”

Axis winked out of view in front of Clubby. Clubby then also shifted into invisibility mode. He looked down and couldn’t see his hands, his feet, his hole pierced torso. What a relief to get rid of that horrid body!

—–

“We’re here,” whispered Axis to Clubby as low as possible at the entrance to the bar. But no one was inside. They checked every corner while still being transparent. Axis then ended invisibility mode; winked into view in front of Clubby. The demonic card creature reluctantly did likewise.

“We’ve been had!” cried Axis, realizing an escape hatch was used.

Turns out, The End of Time extended beyond the bar.

—–

“Hi, Freddy. Just passing through.” But The Fredinator was too deep in meditation to acknowledge Patrick and Zoidboro’s sudden appearance.

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Tagged as Axis/Tropp-Opp/Campbell O'Pine^*++++@, Clubby^*+#, Freddy^*, Patrick Starr^^^*, Tin Tin (Soldier Man)^*+, Zoidboro^*+$

January 2, 2019 · 6:23 am

The Bar at the End of Time

“We can speak freely here, Pat. Away from the users. Go ahead.”

“Well. Like I said, I knew he came in from the high desert because he was all gritty and grimy and stuff.”

“Where else would he come from?” asked Zoidboro intelligently.

Patrick Starkey adjusted his cap. “Nowhere, I suppose. And he was different looking. Not as mutanty.” Patrick stared at Zoidboro and the various projections issuing from his head. “No offense, man.”

“None taken.” Zoidboro decided to direct the conversation toward the heart of the matter. “Tell me how Rosehaven came up?”

—–

“They’re down there, Axis.”

“We have them now.”

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Tagged as Axis/Tropp-Opp/Campbell O'Pine^*++++@, Clubby^*+#, Patrick Starr^^^*, Tin Tin (Soldier Man)^*+, Zoidboro^*+$

July 13, 2018 · 8:20 am

N. Yd

“Tilers, Tessa. It marks this place as safe after all, despite the surface malignancy.

“But we can’t take a chance anyway this time — fog rolling in; darkness too. We better ascent that tall ladder over there to higher ground for the night.”

“I’m *more* than ready to get out of these lowlands,” Tessa offered, staring back at the pirate ship from whence they came. Shark references everywhere. And not in a good and beneficial way. *Those* signs are there too, and in much more profusion. Tessa thinks that her Grandpa Gold puts way too much stock in these Tilers he goes on about at times. Left their signets here, dropped their talismans there. Sanctified grounds, he states and walks forward. Nothing malicious has happened… *yet*. And this is just the kind of place to break the lucky streak.

“We’ll come back in the morning if possible,” he says. “If Tilers were here then there is surely more to look at and study.”

“Whatever.”

—–

The next morning, on the same spot:

“Oh the weather is *much* better now,” Tessa voiced sarcastically. “I can barely see 20 feet in front of me.”

“The tile here indicates safety, however,” her grandpa reinforced. “Safe to split up, then. You examine the buildings that way,” — Grandpa Gold points behind Tessa — “and I’ll work my way around from this end — counterclockwise — until we meet up somewhere in the middle. Is that okay?”

“If you say it’s safe, then I suppose it’s safe,” says Tessa, doubting the words coming out of her mouth but also putting her trust in who she assumes is a wiser and older being.

“Saves time that way,” he adds without verification from the child. “See you in the middle.” He turns away from her and walks toward the first structure in his direction. Tessa begins on her side.

—–

“Freak show eh?” Tessa speaks aloud at one of the westernmost structures of the compound, thinking back to something called the Elephant Man, she believes. Nothing to make fun of! But is this an octopus who has the features of a man or visa versa? Anyway — not alive. Taking a picture and moving on…