Category Archives: 06

November 16, 2019 · 9:59 am

blue red yellow DEAD

“So here it is all mapped out, Hucka. The murder. *The* Murder. The ‘crime scene’: here. This building. Upstairs I mean. Not downstairs — *here* here. Up there here.”

“The ‘murdered’ is Dr. Rabbid Baumbeer, yes,” speaks Hucka Doobie, trying to speed things along. Much to analyze and absorb tonight.

“Then next is the ‘motive’,” continues Baker Bloch in a line. “Peepee, the person –er, creature murdered in the first place. The start of a chain reaction.”

“Cool.” Hucka Doobie moves to the next line down. “Then the ‘#1 suspected’ — the murderer of *Rabbid*, is, um, Lu Ellen? Did I get that name right?”

“Lu Ellen Hutchinson, yes. Or maybe Hutchison without the (first) ‘n’. I’ll have to check.”

“But Lu Ellen (for the first name),” Hucka Doobie attempts to firmly establish.

“Yes.”

“Moving on, then, is ‘clue # 1’, which is provided by synchronicity investigator Alice L. Farrowheart. We also know now that this person sometimes goes by Lilly.”

“No, I never said that,” defends Baker Bloch. You must be confused, yes, with Alice Frame. Another Alice F. — perhaps interesting.”

“Okay, I’ll trust you with that,” offers up Hucka Doobie. “But this is from the Red Umbrella, specifically a Sam Parr collage from the Red Umbrella. Specifically specifically Sam Parr 04. This is a marriage. Who is getting married? Well…”

“Wheeler. Wheeler is getting married.” Baker Bloch is referring to information shared with Hucka Doobie earlier as they drank coffee at Spunky’s in Southside. Surprising news!

“The married woman — Wheeler or not — is then throwing a frog toward a green man who is removing his own head in ‘clue # 2’. This is the next collage in Sam Parr — Sam Parr 05, part 1 of a diptych.”

“Part 1 of 2, yes,” elaborates Baker Bloch (unnecessarily).

“So in summary — for now — the just married gal throws a frog at a man and turns him green and removes his head. This is her father Peepee, murdered by Bullfrog. But it is *also*…”

“Bullfrog,” completes Baker Bloch. I don’t think it can get any clearer than that.

“Nope. I agree. The rabbit is obviously the frog.”

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September 10, 2019 · 8:29 am

Devil

“I can see it in my mind’s eye right now Ruby, er, Cathy. Right over there in that open part of the sky. A round, perfectly black head with round black ears to match. Don’t you see it too?”

“I’m, er, *prrr*, trying!”

“No need to shout,” scolded Eraserhead Man playfully. “Not when you’re around. We should get married right here and now, babydoll. Right at this crossroads. Save us a lot of time later on.”

Cathy A. laughs and twirls around in place with her blue rose, acting all ditzy as usual.

“Anyway…” EM stares back up in the sky. “That’s what I see. We’ll, hmm, probably have to alter it for copyright reasons. Maybe, um, *deflate* one of the ears; make it look more like a dog’s. A droopy dog ear, yes. Like that card I used in the other show.”

“‘On the Air’? *prrr*.”

“No, the other one. The less famous one.”

“Oh.”

“Like *this*, actually.” Eraserhead Man holds up his coffee mug for Cathy A. to see. Indeed: droopy dog ears. She gets a little afraid at the sight, which EM senses.

“Yeah, I know how you feel. Anyway, that’s what follows Axis around, wherever he goes now. The North will have to surrender unconditionally to the high menace.” Eraserhead Man looks up. “The high menace in the high castle.

Now place your rose over there and we’ll begin again.”

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September 10, 2019 · 7:13 am

return

“He will — see you now.” The voice was husky and deep, sort of like Darth Vader.

“That’s great. That’s wonderful! I’m so happy.”

“Are you — not rattled?” the giant turtle asked, his beak only inches from the crocogator’s ear now.

“Nah, nah, I’m okay. It was better than, say, Barry *Manilow*, hehe.” Crocogator stared over at Andy’s huge face. “Get it? Because Barry Manilow is so *awful*.” Andy most definitely didn’t get it. There was nothing more to say here.

—–

“Watch out for the exploding lamb!” Winkler the big frog warned. Luke Skywalker this time.

Crocogator walked around the lamb, but in doing so moved just left enough to fall out of “Heaven” while crossing this open corner.

“God dammit!”

So close to God, he lamented while dusting himself off back on the ground. Now I’ll have to start all over.

He looked around for the clown so that he could start all over.

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September 10, 2019 · 5:53 am

across the road

Inertia had finally found her. Wonderful, smart, pretty, dedicated Teebestia, love of her life. A *castle* at that, she thinks. I knew she’d go further than her dead end lawyering job in Olde Lapara Town. But, trouble is, does this also mean she’s *married*? One way to find out; hope she’s home.

She came one day too late. Axis had already seen this probability and taken steps to avoid it. The gay life of Inertia and Teebestia, happy together, would not play out now. Shame: such a good match, a *positive* relationship. But Axis had won the battle of the heart. You cannot outbrain him.

Inside:

“Finally found a place to hang my painting, Teebestia.

“I think — I’m home.”

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September 9, 2019 · 7:09 am

X-City Bar-Cafe

“It’s pretty obvious by now, Hucka Doobie, that the South is slowly but surely taking over the North, bit by bit, piece by piece. There’s Gregson to consider, what with its 7 spawned little demons wreaking havoc on the town by now, no doubt. Then Pipersville with its Red Devil Alley.”

“Creepy Alley, uh huh,” the bee person responded. Psychic guru to the blog.

“And now… X-City. Center of the North, as Horns of Hatton is to the South. Capitol cities each. But now: infested with chickens. Just like the other one.”

Hucka Doobie looks around, wishing they’d stop their gall darn cackling for just a moment so she can think clearer.

“Red Devil again. Who is…”

“Don’t say it yet,” requests Hucka Doobie, now holding her head from the pain.

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September 9, 2019 · 5:06 am

in the middle

“Ahh! A monster!

“Oh thank God. A beautiful princess…

“… with a death skull face *panic*!

“What *is* this place?

“And where the hell did the clown go? Over there?”

—–

—–

“Oh God! Lost control! Spinning…!”

—–

“Okay, there’s the Lord,” Crocogator continues, “safe” on the other side now. “But I can’t concentrate on him because of all these *slapping tentacles*. This is not Heaven. It’s Hell!

“And where’s that horrible, gut wrenching ‘music’ coming from?

“Certainly not from over *there*.

“Can’t… *move*.”

—–

“How long to keep him in the cat place, sire?”

“Oh, a couple hollers more should do it.”

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September 8, 2019 · 8:54 am

Middle Game

“I pray that I’ve done good by you my Lord.”

“ARISE.”

“Okay, yes sir,” Crocogator speaks to the booming voice in the sky, his King. He rises.

“AROUSE.”

“Um. What?”

“A ROSE.”

Sacrificee Renaldo O’Donnell stands up from the sacrificial altar, heart beating again within him. He has a new one.

“I will take you to the King now.”

—–

“Not those two silly beings. The real one. Over here.”

“Alright. Thank you again! Thank you so much.”

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September 8, 2019 · 6:33 am

castle 42

Hmph. I suddenly can’t remember why I’m here at the X. Something about finding something. But what?

He breathes deeply; massive, blood stained chest heaving.

Better get back to Buster over in Long Drive, Pitch thinks. Back to the dance — last thing I recall.

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September 8, 2019 · 5:55 am

castle 02

“Lovely tea, thank you,” Axis compliments after taking another sip. “So tell me more about yourself. Tell me more about this Omicron City you are from. Fascinating story! Serial killings and a demon. What was the demon’s name?”

Well, *he* sure cuts to the heart of things, Teebestia thinks, rubbing the front of her own exposed heart reflexively. But that was a name she dare not utter. Does — Axis know something about all this? How did he get so quickly to the unspeakable center? “I can’t recall,” she instead answers. “Something like Aspartame.” It was a joke name concocted during a particular drinking binge in a particular bar. With a particular person. Another seer, although in this case not also a seeker (of Truth).  It served the purpose.

“Ahh,” he answered innocently (or tried). “Like the sugar substitute. Very clever. That always makes me nauseous — don’t know about you.”

“Oh I stay away from all that. Because of the name, see.”

“You’re smart.” He takes another sip. His voice was as bass as Baker Bloch’s. Teebestia’s was, how to put it, musical? She hits all the right notes for him at least.  He looks at the heart again.

“And you? Tell me about your search for the heart of the X.”

We synchronize! “Well — a particular person at the heart who is also the heart.” He stares again. He *knows*.

Her room sealed it.

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September 7, 2019 · 9:04 am

castle

“Ahh. Good to be home.”

—–

“What is that enchanting music, eh?

“And how are you tonight, Ms. Teebestia. Long time no see!”

“H-how did *you* get here?”

“And good to see you too(!). I got here the same way everybody does. By logging in and changing clothes if needed.” Axis inspects Teebestia more carefully. “But, hmm, I see you don’t have that need. The logging in, I mean. You are just a prop!”

“Shhh. Baker Bloch is listing in.”

Axis turns toward the piano; sees a large, pale, somewhat blood splattered vampire playing the tune he was so admiring before and after entering the castle. So captivating. He must ask the name. But: Baker Bloch?

He calls over to the vampire. “Baker Bloch?”

The piano playing screams to a halt. Literally: a scream, a very high pitched one and nothing like Pitch’s actual voice. He was channeling a certain spider, but the spell has ended. He doesn’t know how to play the piano. He lifts his suddenly non-talented hands away from the keyboard. Pitch Darkly no more.

—–

“W-what are *you* doing here?”

“Exactly what I said,” Teebestia quickly followed.

“Well,” Axis replied after a pause. “Aren’t *we* a fine 3-n-1, eh?”

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