Tag Archives: Wheeler Wilson^^++++\@

Blames

They were at Tiff’s Bar, only about 100 yards east from Wheeler’s recently set up house on New Island. A potential local hangout for the gang. Baker was on his second mug of Johnson’s Rye. Old Mabel was studying the the labels of drinks behind the bar but not imbibing.

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“Weatherman says Storm Lucy’s cleared out of the area now, Old Mabel,” declares Baker Bloch. “You’ll be able to get back to your Cry I. tomorrow.”

“Wonderful,” is all she could manage.

—–

Old Mabel returned to the house to take a nap, she said, while Baker Bloch explored more of the local environs and snapped pictures.

Baker’s Spookmobile, New Island version, spookily turned into a love bug during Night 1 of their stay. Groovy, I suppose.

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The Diagonal House, as Baker Bloch calls it, next to Tiff’s Bar. Vacant right now.

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Visiting a paraphernalia shop, Baker again wonders why there are no true mirrors in Second Lyfe.

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Lot’s of open, grassy duneland here, courtesy of the Lindens.

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Baker found this mystery pipe 2 days back…

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… then made friends with the mechanoid who lived next door to it. Robot Derak Jones was his name, a physics and astronomy professor at New Island Community College. Quite the scholar. “What have you been reading today, RDJ?” Baker asks. “You’re sitting on them,” he replies.

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And, yes, Robot Derak Jones knows of the very similarly named Cardboard Derek Jones in Collagesity. Turns out they’re 1st cousins. RDJ says he’ll have to go back with Baker Bloch sometime to visit with CDJ again. “Cardboard often stayed at my uncle’s place here during the summers over at Sharp’s Angle,” RDJ explained at the time. “We explored Pipewold. But I don’t want to go back there, and neither do you want to go there the first time. Trust me.”

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Baker Bloch’s faux mother Old Grey showed up. “Figured you were down here lazing about. Your supper’s on the table getting cold. Get — home.” She didn’t mince her words. She didn’t greet Robot Derak Jones. Old Mabel speculated they might even have some kind of history neither is talking about. “And afterwards I want you to give the Love Bug a good washing, including underneath it. Don’t want it to rust out like your blame Spook Beetle.”

Baker wondered again about the presence of the Love Bug here and the Spookmobile over in Collagesity. Reality had split asunder. Blame orange.

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VW(XYZ)

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“Let’s see what this so called ‘secret society’ is all about, you Joker,” he says. Wilson goes into the VWX fairy house.

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—–

“I thought this is where he said the hole was, son.” Allen Martin pivots around, looking. “Where’d Aspy go?”

“Dunno pops,” answered Doogie, who continued staring at something in the distance.

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“There he is. Where’s he heading *now*?”

Doogie does a 180. “Looks like he’s going down the hill on the other side of this house or whatever it is… shed.”

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“Well keep up with him,” his father implored. “You know my legs aren’t what they use to be.” Allen Martin struggles to get to his feet. His son doesn’t move to help him, instead following the snake.

“Hmm,” Doogie says. “Now he’s on some kind of green table. “Looks like he’s waiting on us maybe.” Allen Martin hobbles up to his son.

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“Great. Another hill.” the older Martin complains. “Help me out a little this time, Doogie. Will ya?”

“Sure, okay,” the son says lacadasically.

10 minutes later they were at the bottom, staring at the picture. On the white pillar now, Aspinwall kept knocking his snake head against it in emphasis.

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“Hey pops,” Doogie finally says. “Doesn’t that kind of look like the picture of your old college down on the bottom floor of our house now.”

“I was thinking the same thing,” the older man replies. “I was on the wrong wall.”

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Bridges

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“I guess this is goodbye Baker Bloch.”

“Not forever Wheeler. Just until we can figure out how to deal with you and Mid Hazel. Baker Blinker, Hucka Doobie and I.”

“Tell Baker Blinker congratulations on the land sale. Oh, one last thing. I want to say goodbye to Old Mabel as well.”

“Very well.” He changes.

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“My car disappeared,” starts Old Mabel.

“Never mind that *young* Martian. You can rez another one over there on Mid Hazel’s property.” She turns around and points.

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“I hope that, at the least, you do not consider me a mortal enemy. I only used the Wilson mask as needed. I am truly David Bowie underneath it all.”

“Are you?” asks a still skeptical Old Mabel.

“I guess that’s what we’ll find out. Come over here now and rezz another car and skedaddle back to your Heterocera.” She walks forward, and Old Mabel follows. “Just through these pillars.”

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“No,” says Old Mabel firmly, sensing a possible trap. “I’ll rezz the car from this position. I see the property lines.”

The Spookmobile appears above the “B” on the wooden platform. Old Mabel hops in remotely.

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“You better change back into Baker Bloch or you might not be able to reach the pedals.”

“Oh right,” states Old Mabel, and she transforms once more. But Baker then has to stand up again and sit back into the car to fit properly. Mid Hazel’s plan had worked (of course).

Baker Bloch steers the car toward Wheeler and runs into her, moving her about 5 feet up and sideways both. Smiling, he drives up beside her again.

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“Aw, what the heck,” he says, already under the spell. “Hop in. Let’s go see that (boy) Karoz of yours. Just for a little bit.”

“Just for a little bit,” reiterates Wheeler.

As they sloppily made their way back onto Highway 9, the only bridge into New Island remained open…

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… for a lesser bit.

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AFTERWARDS…

… Baker Bloch bought Old Mabel and Hucka Doobie dinner at Perch to make up for almost killing them with his Spookmobile several hours earlier. The catch of the day was… perch. All ordered it. All complimented the chef (Keat Owens: back on the job!). Baker Bloch and Hucka Doobie talked of old times in the White Palace. Hucka told Old Mabel some of the story about Greenhead in Real Lyfe, where he was originally from.

“The bees and the humans from down south in Whitehead Crossing originally got on,” he explains, “but then came Uncle Joe and Aunt Zoe, the *bad* humans or human*villains*.

“Nice pun,” adds Baker Bloch.

“Thanks,” replies Hucka Doobie. “We had to seal up the hole. Thus opened up the hole more near Whitehead Crossing, but later on. It was merged with Kentucky’s Mammoth Cave, the biggest hole we could find up there — perhaps you’ve seen the related collage, no?” He turns to Baker Bloch for a possible answer.

“I don’t know.” Baker, in turn, turns to Old Mabel. “How far up have you been in the Fal Mouth Moon?”

Old Mabel realizes she hasn’t ascended past the 2nd or 3rd floor of the 7 story building, the largest in Collagesity. “Not all the way,” she admits.

“The collage Hucka Doobie is referring to is at the very tip top,” he then says.

“Field trip!” yelps Hucka Doobie, noisily plopping his knife and fork down on a plate filled with perch skeletons.

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—–

“There it is Old Mabel,” Baker Bloch says, indicating the Whitehead Crossing hole Hucka Doobie referenced earlier. Old Mabel sits down directly in front of it for further study. Hucka Doobie is looking at an image of an oblong blue “12 Oz Mouse character” partially hidden by a Crossing tree.

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Old Mabel coincidentally stares at the same character positioned in front of the hole, full figure this time. Both mouth the same thought at the same time.

“A peanut?”

—–

“And of course there’s Rhoda, a bartender in our world and that world both,” explains Baker Bloch further along in his “12 Oz Mouse” spiel. “I’m not sure if he’s been up this far in the Fal Mouth Moon either. Have to make a mental note to ask him the next time we’re over at Joker’s Wild.”

“I want to hang in Collagesity more, Baker Bloch,” states Hucka Doobie. “Where’s Baker Blinker tonight?”

“I don’t know. Maybe at her house, the Gloomy Gus?”

“Strange she’s not a part of The Table.”

“She and Wheeler don’t really get along that well.”

“Karoz,” says Hucka Doobie.

“Yup.”

—–

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“So there’s Carrcassonnee as Fitz the Mouse himself staring at Peanut,” says Baker Bloch to Old Mabel, seeing her still interested in that part of the collage. “He’s holding a corndog. That’s reference to Roostre.”

“What did you say?”

“I said, that’s reference to the Roostre character of ’12 Oz Mouse’.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about this *Roostre* before?” she demanded.

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Table Meeting 02

For Table Meeting No. 2, Baker Bloch arrived at the Blue Feather in his self named Spookmobile, almost running over Old Mabel and Hucka Doobie while humming down Old Cannon Road from his attic home in the western part of town. Baker apologized to the two while they were walking up behind him, nerves rattled.

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“You know it’s only about 100 yards from your place to the Blue Feather,” says Hucka Doobie, still dusting herself off from diving behind Major Stone to avoid being hit. “You don’t really need to drive. What is that thing anyway? Where’d you get it?”

Baker Bloch realized Hucka Doobie wasn’t inworld all that much and hadn’t caught up with the news. So he caught her up.

“Fascinating,” says Hucka Doobie afterwards. Anson and Anton. Yet another one. *Must* be the work of Mid Hazel.”

“And we further speculate that Wheeler is trapped on New Island now, unable to escape. I’d take you there to see the broken bridge but the meeting’s starting up in a moment.”

“Without Wheeler?” Hucka Doobie scratches her bee head in confusion.

“I’m taking Wheeler’s place,” Baker declared. “Let’s head inside and get this thing started.”

“Cool, I suppose,” says Hucka Doobie, still a bit in the dark on things. Old Mabel remained silent, not liking where this was, er, heading.

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—–

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“As most of you know,” Baker began, “Wheeler’s wishes were to move forward instead of backwards. Toward ‘Pumpkintwisters’ and the future instead of ‘Billfork’ and its Northfork and Billville in the past. *But*… Wheeler isn’t here.”

Old Mabel suddenly perked up. Could it be? Could it be?

“So we’re going to talk about ‘Billfork’ tonight.”

Old Mabel actually jumped out of her chair a bit in joy. She had been preparing to discuss ‘Billfork’ for weeks now, listening to all the pertinent John Lennon solo efforts and reading up about the Ono debacle and so forth.

“Now I’m sorry Tin S. Man. I know this was your time to shine.”

“‘T’is okay, Baker Bloch. The Ray Davies inside of me can wait. I am sympathetic to the plight of Northfork and Billville both. Both flooded, both moved. A moving tale each.” He smiled.

“Yes,” agreed Baker. “So since we’re backing up from ‘3 Friends of Belleville’ instead of going forward, we can point out that *Belle*ville camed from *Bill*ville — and also visa versa since time really doesn’t exist. This is part of the overarching complexity of the Piera. Old Mabel, do you want to help me out and pull up some pertinent videos on the interwebs? Try ‘Northfork + Polish’.”

“Sure thing, Wilson.” Everyone stared at her. “I mean, Baker Bloch, tee hee. Slip of the tongue.” She went over to the suave chair she had sat in so many times now and did the appropriate search.

“So what is ‘Billfork’ you might be asking?” then said Baker Bloch. “Well, on the audio side it’s primarily ‘Boom Dot Bust’ by Firesign Theatre. On the video side it’s the movie ‘Northfork’ by the Polish twins, Michael and Mark. As Tin S. Man alluded to, both feature towns that have to be moved in order to be saved. The town of Northfork is being flooded by a new lake. Billville is threatened by tornadoes, and also, strangely and syncily, a flood at the end, where the mayor has to turn into a fish and ‘swim, swim, swim’ to stay alive. Tonight, to begin, we’re going to look at a number of clips from ‘Northfork’ which are available on the Youtubes. We’re just going to look at them as they appear in Old Mabel’s hit list here, and I’ll talk about the relationship with ‘Billfork’ afterwards — I don’t think we need to do them in order. So if you would just start at the top of your list, Old Mabel, and work down.”

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“Yes *sir*”.

—–

2 1/2 hours later they had gone through innumerable Youtube videos featuring not only ‘Northfork’, but Firesign Theatre, Pink Floyd, and John Lennon and his Beetles. Even Old Mabel was getting a little tired. But they had learned a lot. They knew ‘Billfork’ contained some kind of code which Baker Bloch simply dubbed the Billfork Code during the meeting, having come up with that name several hours prior. Baker had passed out most of the 8 oranges Old Mabel dreamt about to participants at The Table this night, setting the remainder at empty seats while saying that each represented a whole track from ‘Boom Dot Bust’ used in ‘Billfork’. Old Mabel grasped hers tightly as Baker handed it to her, making sure she didn’t drop it this time (unlike in the dream). “Now I know we’re all tired,” Baker continued, “but we need to also talk about the 9th tonight. The 9th is ‘Doom Bot Dust’, the opposite of ‘Boom Dot Bust’. And that’s where we think the code comes from. A south by southwest direction.” Old Mabel nodded her head in agreement as she looked past Hucka Doobie in that direction.

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0003, 0415, Carrcass+08, New Island

Anton

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“So this is another one of your disguises Wheeler.”

“Yes. Baker Bloch,” she answered. “But call me Wilson (when I’m like this). Or Wheeler — whatever. So… you have information about Doreena.”

“She is called Doflia now,” states Keat Owens. “Reborn on January 15th of this year. She has Mad Max hair, (and) Apocalyptic Female top, shorts and boots.”

“She has turned into a monster,” Wheeler-as-Wilson speculates.

Not really. Come to the map with me. “We can teleport through the pin.

—–

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“Not there,” states Keat Owens. “Let’s check Yvonnee.”

—–

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“Often right here, but it’s late in the night, almost dawn. To quote Billy Corgan: ‘They only come out at night.'”

“Close enough. Speaking of which,” says Wheeler. “I must begin preparing for the next Table meeting.”

“So you’re going with the forward Pumpkintwisters direction?” Wheeler nods. “Over the backwards Billfork direction?” Wheeler keeps nodding. Keat Owens reapplies one of his hands to his chin in a thoughtful manner. “There’s one more avatar we’re keeping an eye on, only known as Anton. I don’t have a direct landmark yet but he’s in Anson. Obviously another one named for their inhabiting sim. We’ll have to approximate (the landmark).”

—–

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Not what they were expecting.

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—–

Afterwards:

“Damn! Crashed again.”

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Just after that:

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New Leaves

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“It’s time to take off your mask, Librarian,” speaks a freshly arrived Wheeler. “I have learned information concerning you from an old witch named Mid Hazel over at New Island.”

“Alright,” he relented. “I know Mid Hazel and her ways. But when I reveal who I am you must change as well. We must do it in concert. Ready?…”

“Don’t play that one two three game with me,” demands Wheeler. “Just remove the mask.”

He did.

And she did.

“As people like us say,” the transmogrified Wheeler pronounces, “we meet again.”

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Might as well…

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Old Mabel has decided to indulge in an old love and re-take up painting, but tonight finds her just staring at a blank canvas until she looks at the time and remembers the Table Meeting. “Don’t want to be late again!” she says as she stores away the paint laden palette.

But she was anyway. 7:05: Wheeler was already passing around oranges to everyone as she hustled up the stairs into the room. The Beatles walking Abbey Road once more adorned the wall at the top. And the flatties at the bottom she dreamed about 2 nights before remained. There was also a new throw pillow placed just to the left of the stairs going up.

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“Ah, *Old* Mabel. Just in time for your fruit. Here you go.” Wheeler threw the orange at an unprepared Old Mabel, who was holding a notepad. The orange flew past her to the left, landing on the floor and bounding down the stairs she just navigated.

“*Sorry* I’m late,” she said, placing the notepad in front of her chair at The Table. “I’ll go retrieve that.”

“Please do, and hurry,” says Wheeler. “Hopefully it didn’t fall through the crackway into the lower floor. It might take you an hour to get back!”

Old Mabel quickly reviewed in her mind where the opening Wheeler mentioned was, and the route she would have to take to return if she too needed to fall through. 1st to 3rd to 2nd. That’s how it works in Wheeler’s lemony Blue Feather.

“Oh dear,” she said after going back down the stairs and not seeing the orange anywhere in the antechamber. “Looks like Wheeler’s worries have come to, er, *fruition*.”

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She’d have to jump down.

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(continued in)

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Sewed Up? 03

(continued from)

Wheeler was gone, and then Old Mabel saw the teleport invite. “Join me in Zao.” She complied, and found herself in the middle of an almost empty room. A stoic security guard stood next to the door.

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“This is where reality ends and collage starts. Look into the corners, Old Mabel. Are you awake or dreaming? Is that munchkin librarian over there real or hallucination?”

Mabel scanned each corner but didn’t see a thing. She was beginning to think Wheeler might be quite insane…

… until she went through the door and turned around.

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Winnfield.

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Winfield.

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“I think you better start spelling it with that extra “n”, love. It took me weeks to pick up his trail.”

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The end?

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Sewed Up? 02

(continued from)

“Just kidding,” Wheeler then says while standing up. “I can drive too. Watch this.” Wheeler performs a golf swing for Old Mabel…

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… who strangely can’t see Wheeler any longer from the position of her chair.

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“I didn’t catch that,” says the confused Martian. She moves closer to Wheeler’s voice, and almost runs into her. “Oh… sorry.”

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“Stop apologizing for everything,” Wheeler demands. “I bet I could hit that 8 Ball over there clear to the other side of those confounded woods.” She then assumes a normal position. “Say this Unch just appeared to you, eh? Snowbob told me. We used the red phone, don’t worry. Protection witness program, pheh. And where’s Jerome T. Wheeler, *sorry*, Newton when you need him to put out the fires? Did you know Unch was a persimmon tree, Old Mabel?”

Old Mabel admitted that she had not.

“You know what persimmons are used for?” Wheeler then answers herself. “Drivers, Old Mabel. Woods and drivers. A seed, a little thing like yourself, grows up into a tree to be harvested for woods. Tigers, Old Mabel. I knew a tiger who loved golf so much that he turned human just to swing those ebony clubs all day and all night. The night swinging part eventually got him in trouble. The bottom fell out of his winning ways; he’ll never catch Jack Nicholson the Joker. Furry’s bar is safe harbor.” Wheeler smiles.

Old Mabel tried to think of a response to this cryptic talk, but Wheeler continues. “It’s late in the night now Old Mabel. Do you think we should go see Unch and ask him about tigers?”

“I’d like to approach Unch,” admits Old Mabel. “But I’m still scared. I’m not ready.”

“Well he — or she — *obviously* wants to speak to you. He’s basically beckoning you over to his spot in the forest: 168/168 isn’t it?”

Old Mabel says she thinks so.

“Yes… Unch is a persnickety creature. The fruits of his thinking are small, detailed and precise. He is a tree who can’t see the forest. He is inside himself all the time. He thinks you will like it inside him too. He wishes to take you away. The 200th wishes you to be with him forever and ever. Forget the other 199. Forget *everything* else. The 200th, Old Mabel. That’s your brother, your mother-father Winfield — is that spelled with one or two “n”s?”

Old Mabel says it’s spelled with one “n”, and then wonders how Wheeler has so much information about her past… and of Unch. She’s only half believing anything Wheeler has to say, though. But for now she’s taking in the *story*. Is Unch a selfish creature? Self absorbed? She’d find out the answer soon enough.

“Come with me, Old Mabel. We need to go back to Corsica. To a village near but not in Askja. I want to show you something there. Something you won’t believe.”

(continued in)

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