Daily Archives: December 30, 2015

December 30, 2015 · 12:08 pm

Uncle Meatwad Too

Spongeberg wanted to hear the involved album, so we figured out a way to pipe it into the gazebo. I told him it was my favorite Firesign Theatre album. “Everything You Know Is Wrong” is the name. He listened intently. I was hoping he was remembering the parts I used in “Uncle Meatwad”. Everything hinges on this, I repeat to myself. Don’t goof it up!

He was disappointed that the “Egypt” segment wasn’t on this album. I told him it was on one of their earlier works, called “How Can You Be In 2 Places…” He didn’t seem to want to hear that particular album, and I was relieved. I told him *all* the middle part used “Everything” instead. It was only the 1st and 3rd parts of “Uncle Meatwad”, the *mirrored* parts, that used a little of “2 Places”. He nodded his head. “So this is the important one,” he stated. “I suppose so,” I replied. “This is the middle, the hole in the middle.”

“It’s what we have to discuss,” Carrcassonnee then adds. “This zero, this null. What to plant within. Because there is work to be done still.”

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Filed under **VIRTUAL SL, 0001, Heterocera, Rubi^

Tagged as Baker Bloch^*+++++@, Carrcassonnee^^+++++!, Firesign Theater^*+++++, Spongeberg Resident^*+++++@%

December 30, 2015 · 10:45 am

Uncle Meatwad Won

1st 27 or so minutes of what we eventually saw:

https://www.dropbox.com/s/sk1rf2df5mflb34/VTS_01_1.VOB?dl=0

—–

Afterwards we reconvened at Carrcassonnee’s gazebo to discuss the viewing. Spongeberg wanted to see the first part again to take notes, so Furry Karl and I walked around town some more. Carrcassonnee simply teleported back to her position in the gazebo. I knew it was ultra important that I correctly sell what I would consider the true status of “Uncle Meatwad”. To save the town. To save my reputation as an artist. So the questions began…

“I have made a short list of matches now,” began Spongeberg Resident. “What I saw was 15 minutes of what could be considered random pieces of music, dominated by John Lennon.”

“We call him Lemon here in virtual-land, Spongeberg,” I tried to joke.

“But I also know,” continued Spongeberg, “that this is all real in some way, some fashion… because of ‘Shiny Hare’.”

“Because of ‘Shiny Hare’, yes,” I reinforced. This was about our walk in Frank Park around the Bunny Trail. We talked of “Shiny Hare”. I convinced Spongeberg, his real life counterpart, about the legitimacy of “Shiny Hare”.

“This is an earlier work,” stated Spongeberg.

“Yes,” I said. “From 2007.”

“And it is a double itself.”

“Yes,” I said again. “Twin to [delete name]. I made “Uncle Meatwad” public for a brief period because [delete name] sits hidden behind it, protecting.”

“This is the tajitu,” chips in Furry Karl.

“Yes, I guess it is,” I said, “like the interview with the other Karl, Karl. The trapped Wheeler is [delete name]. The exposed white side of the tajitu is “Uncle Meatwad”. But in another way, “Uncle Meatwad” is trapped, like the Wheeler. Can you help me free him?”

Spongeberg jotted down some more notes. Carrcassonnee was staring at him with her one, big eye.

“Carrcassonnee,” I asked, “What is your opinion? How do I free “Uncle Meatwad” and save the village?”

“Me,” she answered simply.

—–

Spongeberg then says the “Egypt” cue is where it starts to really kick in or “sync”, as he put it. He understood the magic, once more. “Shiny Hare” style magic. “And”, he said, “you work backwards from there to understand the first part. which mirrors the 3rd.”

“Yes,” I said.

“Then the middle part, the last one, is where it all goes down… the hole.”

“Absolutely.” Had I just saved Collagesity?

3rd Audience

It was a busier night for Carrcassonnee. Spongeberg saw the telltale lemon burning in the bowl outside the gazebo on his way to examine Shiny Hare. He took advantage of the being’s presence. He still had some issues.

I, baker b., was not privy to the actual conversation, but I heard what happened second-hand through Furry Karl, who was also on his way to see the new town tower when he spied Spongeberg within the temple and sneaked around the back to listen. I immediately reprimanded him for doing so, but I was also oh so ever curious about what they talked about. So when Furry Karl spilled some of the beans, I made a cup of instant coffee in place of a real one. What could I do? I was the one actually in charge of the town, I felt. These were *my* creations. I of course didn’t tell Furry Karl this. I remembered how he used to just say “Merry Fucking Summer, have a beer”, and so on. Merry Fall, Merry Easter, Merry this and that. What changed? Does he have memory of those muter times? Anyway, to the spilled beans and improvised coffee making…

“Spongeberg still desires to kill the town,” says Karl to me as we enter the palm grove of Collagesity East. “The Hare statue didn’t change his mind.” We both look up. It was towering above us. “It’s a *tower*,” I want to say to Karl.

“I know the taijitu,” he then says, surprising me. “I know of Uncle Meatwad. Things have changed. I am not mute because I have shifted somewhat. Just now, actually. That memory just locked into place. Funny.”

I looked at Furry Karl. His *double* was *in* Uncle Meatwad. “Show me Uncle Meatwad”, he almost demanded. “We can go up to Collagesity to view it. Where the Church of the Red Door is.”

Spongeberg and Carrcassonnee talked about “Uncle Meatwad” most of the time, as it turned out. Me (Baker Bloch), Baker Blinker, Hucka Doobie, and Uncle Meatwad and Shakenstein and such.

“What happened?” Spongeberg asked cooly (says Karl). I imagined Carrcassonnee’s eye rolling upwards.

What Carrcassonnee Meant

Cardboard Derek Jones flirts with fellow flattie Lisa “The Vegetarian” Simpson upon leaving his audience with Carrcassonnee.

What they talked about:

CDJ:

Hey good looking. Haven’t seen you around in a while.

Let’s try that again.

CDJ:

I am sorry to disturb you, sire (that’s what he called Carrcassonnee all through the meeting), but I request that instead of that — eyesore with the giant, prim hogging cat on the top of it just built in our beloved town that we put House Greenup there. This would have pleased Bracket Jupiter as well, I’m sure. He’s not here any longer. You must honor him. And, if I could add, I beg of you to try with all your powerly might to *bring him back*.

Carr. (more booming and “Godly” than with me):

That will not be so, honorable flattie. You must flirt with Lisa before leaving. I will get you a date with my hottie assistant if you write the book and help out baker b. That was him going out the door, you know.

CDJ:

I know. I’ve talked to Baker Bloch quite a number of times in different towns now, starting with VWX Town over in Philudoria. You were there, you and your giant orb of knowingness. You blocked me there too, as I’m recalling. You were an Eastie, weren’t you?

Carr.:

I was a Westie. *You* were an Eastie. Northie, I meant. Mean. You were mean. *And* you were mean, I meant. Meant mean.

CDJ:

I beg of you, sire. Bring Back Bracket.

Carr.:

I will get you a date instead. Lisa the Simpson Vegetarian desires a date. (calling over top of Cardboard Derek Jones’ head) Don’t you sweetie? (Lisa doesn’t answer.) She’s a fully formed girl, now, Mr. James.

CDJ (correcting):

*Jones.* (more humble:) Sire.

Carr.:

By that I mean you cannot see through her any longer. And, by the way, she is me. You flirt with her, you flirt with me. You see that?

CDJ (honestly):

No. (CDJ thought Carr. was joking here)

Carr. (more forcefully):

You can go now and think about what I have spoken to you. You are mean. You are meant to be better. *You* will write the book. That is your punishment. Go your way.

CDJ takes his leave, but, perhaps unwisely (again), flirts will Lisa the V. at the door (see above).

Shiny Hare in Collagesity…

… but for how long? I can’t see it staying. What does that mean for the future of the town, though, if I removed it. Spongeberg has found its weak spot at Head-of-Stream, now unprotected due to prim trims. Shiny Hare was inserted into the village to pacify the same. Maybe I should send Baker Bloch over to Carrcassonnee for possible aid.

—–

Carr.:

Greetings baker b. How was your beach trip? I heard it was superb — wait for it — *weather* har har har.

bb:

Yeah, the weather was great. Me… not so great, at least the 4th day.

Carr.:

4th, for you, is always bad. You are removed from your comfort zone. You are removed, kind of, from your blog. From Carrcassonnee. From Collagesity, I mean there meant. And then me, Carrcassonnee. And Spider. You missed Spider didn’t you?

bb (turning to Spider):

Of course.

Carr.:

But I hear you are about to produce books. The continent of Corsica is first.

—–

Carr.:

There, that’s better! I can see you now with my gigantic orb, hee hee.

bb:

About the books…

Carr.:

Yes?

bb:

Yes, Corsica will be first. I’m not sure if anyone will understand these books, which, after all, constitute my interaction with these continents as recorded in the blog, and…

Carr.:

They’re not travel guides. Did I tell you I’m going to get up and start moving around Collagesity sometimes? My Dr. — Blood; you may know him — recommends it. Says a totally sedentary life is bad for the old bones, which I don’t have any of. But he made his point. I’ll turn into goo eventually, he reinforces. By the other day — you may know of his wife Wanda. Or is it Linda? Gerta?

bb:

What did he look like?

Carr.:

Metallic. Not green. Exterior beating heart. Pointed head. Had a cat assistant who preferred to stay hidden or not present. Might be the same as your Shiny Hare — dunno. What say you Spider? Is Dr. Blood’s cat Shiny Hare way up there hidden in the air? (Spider does not answer) Anyway, he was here, he gave recommendations, he left. Said he was making his rounds. Was in the area anyway. Asked if there was any other citizens of the community to examine while he was here. What was I suppose to tell him, baker b.?

bb:

What did you tell him?

Carr.:

I told him about Spongeberg. And your father [Space Ghost]. And Bracket, but I said Bracket was dead and a ghost now. No examining needed there, ha ha.

bb:

That was just a shame. And it brings back the point about the Corsica book. I’m doing this partly for Bracket. He was a native, after all, and was poised to write the history book himself upon his return. But he couldn’t return.

Carr.:

How about that bastard Cardboard Diesel Rose, his sidekick for a while in old VWX Town?

bb:

Cardboard Derek Jones[ you mean]?

Carr.:

The flat fellow. One of the flat fellows. The monkey in a [space] suit.

—–

Just then, on cue, Cardboard Derek Jones comes to the door of Carrcassonnee’s gazebo, his presence an automatic request for an audience with the great olive being. I don’t know if CDJ was eavesdroping or it was all coincidence, but he was here now, and I left the two to talk together, perhaps get to know each other better, even. I went around town trying to figure out other stuff I could delete to make room for the Shiny Hare tower. I really wanted to keep it. Soon I was up in Collagesity Heights, eyeing the Church of the Red Doors and its 36 prims. Hungrily.