Tag Archives: Pitch Darkly^*

castle 42

Hmph. I suddenly can’t remember why I’m here at the X. Something about finding something. But what?

He breathes deeply; massive, blood stained chest heaving.

Better get back to Buster over in Long Drive, Pitch thinks. Back to the dance — last thing I recall.

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castle

“Ahh. Good to be home.”

—–

“What is that enchanting music, eh?”

“And how are you tonight, Ms. Teebestia. Long time no see!”

“H-how did *you* get here?”

“And good to see you too(!). I got here the same way everybody does. By logging in and changing clothes if needed.” Axis inspects Teebestia more carefully. “But, hmm, I see you don’t have that need. The logging in, I mean. You are just a prop!”

“Shhh. Baker Bloch is listing in.”

Axis turns toward the piano; sees a large, pale, somewhat blood splattered vampire playing the tune he was so admiring before and after entering the castle. So captivating. He must ask the name. But: Baker Bloch?

He calls over to the vampire. “Baker Bloch?”

The piano playing screams to a halt. Literally: a scream, a very high pitched one and nothing like Pitch’s actual voice. He was channeling a certain spider, but the spell has ended. He doesn’t know how to play the piano. He lifts his suddenly non-talented hands away from the keyboard. Pitch Darkly no more.

—–

“W-well. What are *you* doing here?”

“Exactly what I said,” Teebestia quickly followed.

“Well,” Axis replied after a pause. “Aren’t *we* a fine 3-n-1, eh?”

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XXX dance

“They think they are the X, Pitch. But they’re only the western edge: Long Drive. There’s Middle Game left, and there may even be Sink X itself, formerly holding Chip Shot, to complete the game.”

“But the X, the actual crossroads I mean, lies between Long Drive here and Middle Game, which I assume is a destination coming up shortly.”

“But first,” Buster clarified, “The X itself as you put it. Teebestia.”

“Cool.”

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grass talk

Buster knew she would be looking in through the secret window. Some called her Blurmaid, half blue, half (mer)maid. She was what Craighead Phillips dreamed about regularly in the aquarium at the center of the X, Maebaleia/Satori’s only true crossroads. And they *were* at one, as we, (the reader) and I, are. This is so top secret that I’m almost inclined to make the remainder of the posts of this current Collagesity novel private. I believe Buster Damm would feel more comfortable if this were so.

—–

“The X is a portal,” he spoke through the bamboo to his old friend Pitch, his best mate for, well, centuries I suppose. This is secret stuff between two old pals, old buddies. “You found the blue rose by the sign — you know that now.”

“Ahh, blue rose. Should’ve known.”

“Novalis, yes. But the blue rose is close yet again.” He peers at the door he cannot see through once more. “We are — being monitored,” he measured in his high pitched voice.

Pitch let this sink in before responding bassly from his reclining position. “Cathy A. I know about her and the blue rose that once was red. Like, er, Marcus Fox Smartville’s. What — happened to them?”

[delete 5 exchanges]

“We will compensate by editing…”

[delete 3 exchanges]

—–

Annaliza appeared from around the corner. “We have had enough of discussions today if you please. Mr. Pitch sir, you will follow me again to the pool room where we will talk more tomorrow. Mr. Dang, if you will excuse us.”

“Sure, sure.”

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(last?) straw

“Alright Mr. Pitch Darkly darling. You have suffered enough on the America’s flag. You are allowed to see Mr. Burster Dang in the bamboo park this morning.”

“*Finally* You hear that down there Mary?”

“I heard,” she gurgled upward.

—–

“So what gives, Burster? I mean, Buster?”

“Just lay there and don’t move. And talk *through* the bamboo as much as possible. The bamboo is sacred, the bamboo is healing.”

Pitch Darkly intuits he wants to add on something like, “All Hail the Wild Green Grass,” even if Buster doesn’t say it out loud. What made him think this? Then something else came in his mind. “Is — this an audition?” he asked.

Buster became even more serious. “Annaliza. Will you kindly leave Pitch and me alone for a moment.”

Annaliza hesitates, but then acquiesces, bowing deeply before departing in silence. Pitch wanted to shout, “Are you all right down there!” to Mary, but knew she couldn’t hear through the floor. She wasn’t allowed (again). This was very, very wrong.

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inside (Long Drive 02)

“Mary, keep blocking the door.”

“Burster Dang?”

“Buster… DAMM.” Pitch Darkly repeated to the receptionist. “He must be in your database. He’s been writing me for going on 2 years now about this place, and his studies in Sinkology.”

“OH,” Annaliza Pageant exclaimed, looking Pitch over better. “You mean the *vampire*. A tiny, like his wife. Except she is a tween.”

“A tween?” Pitch was unfamiliar with the term.

“A tiny that can also be an un-tiny — normal, er, like you and me.” She studied the tall, bloodied vampire again. “I mean, like *me*.” She was thinking that Pitch might be another type of tweener, except between normal and giant this time.

“Sooo,” Pitch attempted, “Buster is just a plain ol’ tiny.”

“That’s right Pitch sir… darling. But he can turn even tinier. A bat, don’t you think? My English is still not polished, excuse me, even though I have also been here 2 years. Many, many people come through this place. Tinies are handy…”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Buster tells me all about it, how they specifically recruited him. It’s because you can see around them better when in flight. I mean, they can see around *themselves* better. Works well for the scouting.”

“That’s, um, right Sir Pitch.” She looked at Mary now. “But your wife — she is different too?” Mary hadn’t moved an inch since blocking the door a couple of minutes back. Hands on hips, per usual when standing in place.

Pitch glances over at her. “She can sit down too. And fish. Lord you should see that woman fish. She can really reel them in, can’t you Mary?”

“That’s right, Pitch,” Mary readily agreed in her normal, cheerful voice. “Perch is my specialty. But,” she quickly added, “perch is the specialty for the whole continent, er, whole *world*. I bet there’s some in that pond we passed on the back corner of this place. You know, inside the small Linden pine woods.”

“Yes,” the receptionist responded, “there is fish there that I assume. Perhaps your perches too.”

“Ahem,” Pitch urged, indicating the computer and the database pulled up on it. “Buster. Buster Damm, and that’s, D-A-M-M. Like an actual dam but with an extra ‘m’.”

“Oh, that’s funny.” The receptionist giggled briefly. “Like, er, DAMMastock.”

“What?”

“The sink: Finsteraahorn-Dammastock. To go alongside our Grossglockner-Schrekhorn.” The receptionist’s pronunciation was immaculate now. Pitch surmised that she might know German too. Japanese and German, hmmm. What were we dealing with here?

(to be continued?)

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Long Drive 01

“You know it all ends here, Mary.”

“I know. Better bust out Buster from that school-prison, then. And some other stuff.”

“Catapult?”

“You bet.”

—–

“Alright, Mary. The plan is, once I get this thing turned around, to shoot you over the top of that wall and get you inside…”

“Right.”

“Where you’ll find a door somewhere and then let me in.”

“Okay.”

“Ready? Oops. Almost forgot. Have to turn it around first. Ooh. Young man, young man,” Pitch beckons to a boy approaching from behind.

“What’s all this?” he asks in a geeky, squeeky voice. “What are you, heh, doing?”

“Never mind that, fair youth of toothy persuasion. Just help me get this thing aimed the right way if you don’t mind.”

“Are you looking for the front door? ‘Cause I can show you that. You don’t have to hurdle your girlfriend over the wall and risk loosing her forever.

“I’m sturdy,” Mary insisted from above them. “I won’t break.”

“You probably just missed it. It’s pretty small, heh.”

“Maybe we better do it his way, dearest,” urges Pitch, not doubting Mary’s word but still not wanting to risk his own injury turning the heavy catapult around.

“Yeah, heh, right this way.” Preston Weston says.

“Okay. Come on Mary.”

“Ohhhhh.” She dearly wanted to experience the thrill of it all.

—-

“So here we are. And this is as far as I’m allowed to take you today, heh.”

(to be continued?)

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