Tag Archives: Spider^*+!

October 18, 2016 · 10:11 am

Spiderhorse 02

“I’m so sorry, Hucka Doobie. I went to the bar instead of the diner here. Carrcassonnee didn’t correct her speech in the blog until after I left. But the bar was closed — no sign of Furry Karl or anyone else there. I checked the portal very quickly to make sure it remained unblocked. I figured you were down here.”

“No sign of Starbuccarina[ either]?” Hucka Doobie was still irritated but getting over it. Her left eye twitched nervously, but she had the glasses on. No weakness shown.

“No,” answered Karoz. “The great 3-n-1 must be in mothballs once more.”

“You work for me, right?”

“Yes, Hucka Doobie. I’ve worked for you for a long time.”

“I’m going to give you your next assignment. You will go into the collages, the nexus. Inside Spider will become a horse. Ride that horse to the next town over and dismount. Don’t look to the left. Don’t look to the right. Just straight ahead. Go to the end of the road. Enter the bar or diner or whatever is there. Don’t speak to anyone. Just go over to the person who doesn’t have a head and ask where you are. Because he’s the only one who can’t tell you. When you get that information, go into the back room and lie down and wait for sleep. When it comes you will be in the place he incorrectly told you about. This is the nexus. Wait for Spongeberg. That is all.”

“Hucka Doobie, I have so many questions about Baker Blinker and Wheeler and Furry Karl…”

“All that will have to wait. Go into the nexus. Lie down and wake up in a better place. The green, green hills. We have ended.”

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October 18, 2016 · 9:55 am

Spiderhorse 01

Karoz Blogger:

We must send Spider back into the collages, Carrcassonnee. There is no other choice.

Carr.:

I agree. But I cannot separate from my eye [at the same time]. Collagesity will collapse.

Karoz:

Then I will have to take it — you — with me.

Carr.:

I cannot move. I am immobile.

Karoz:

We’ll have to figure out a way.

Carr.:

Hucka Doobie wants to speak with you tonight. She says to meet her at the ~~bar~~ diner at 20:00 o’clock.

Karoz:

That’s 3 minutes from now!

Carr.:

You better hurry. She doesn’t like to wait.

—–

“Where is the f-er,” she thinks.

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September 21, 2016 · 7:03 am

Talk

“Is that suppose to be Donald Trump over there, Carrcassonnee?” Wheeler asks in the awkward silence after sitting down in her special chair.

“I don’t know. Is it?”

“I don’t know neither. Either?”

“Why don’t you just try to gauge my eye out again, Wheels? Can I call you Wheels? Wheeler the Wheelie.”

“Baker Blinker is protecting you now. We made a pact, a deal. Part of that deal is that you and I have to get along. So I’m here. Talking to you.”

“What do you dislike about me, Wheels? Wheelie? Which do you prefer? Gauger, perhaps.”

“I am you. I don’t like the myself I use to be. With Perch. Perch riding around on Spider. Spider use to be a horse. That’s in the collages. You have to send her back in. You know so little. It irritates me sometimes, is all. I get impatient.”

“I know a *lot* woman.”

“Not as much as you think. Not at all. I’ve been in those collages myself. I’ve been to Stonethwaite, to Tungaske — that’s in Canada and not Russia by the way. I’ve been to those special places that make up the nexus. *We* operate from that nexus. Whitehead Crossing. Do you remember Whitehead Crossing, Carrcassonnee?”

“Of course. Kind of. And: not really. No, I don’t know that place atall.”

“That’s where I’m from. I’m from all of those places. That’s where I met Spongeberg. We had a thing going on back in the wild wooly 70’s. Ever heard of Jagger Juice?”

“No.”

“Tommy Tums? Richard Rechts? Bizarronator? Those were my clan.”

“Sounds like an evil superhero alliance.”

“It was! We had a number of eyes laying around we would huff on back then. Your mama.”

“What?”

“I said, your mama.”

Carr. (calling through the door):

Baker Blinker!! A little help!

—–

BBlinker:

She’s just pulling your leg. Go ahead Wheeler. Admit you were pulling Carrcassonnee’s leg. You don’t know her mother.

Wheeler:

The heck I don’t. Huffing and puffing on her. All night long.

BBlinker:

Alright let’s just end it at that. Now just *look* at what you did to Carrcassonnee again!

(after a pause)

Wheeler:

I can’t believe you have to call in Baker Bloch again to change Carrcassonee ’round. He needs to give everything over to you. Just deed it over. The whole town, the part that’s not yours. 98 percent?

BBlinker (admitting):

About.

Wheeler (standing):

I even have to get up for this charade?

BBlinker:

Yeah. Sorry. (pause) We’re done.

Wheeler:

She’s still got a little greenish glow around her belly.

BBlinker:

The night marches on. We must end soon. We can’t look at every detail.

Wheeler:

I didn’t think the mama joke would affect her like this. Change her over again.

BBlinker (looking at the script and reading):

It will take — sorry — it will take many episodes of 12 Oz Mouse to revive her again. Perhaps even 13.

Wheeler:

Nice. Why don’t you just remove her eye now. While she’s away like this. It would be easy. Then we could go to Muff-Birmingham. I’ve shown you pictures. It’s beautiful. We could get a place somewhere way up in the air. Buy a whole wrestling arena before we leave and take it with us. Then when we get back we just rent. Rent somewhere else. Away from here.

—–

“That eye would take us far.”

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September 19, 2016 · 8:47 am

Collagesity’s Future

Hucka Doobie heard from Baker Blinker heard from Karoz Blogger heard from someone over in BoB about a rumor going around that Collagesity is in imminent danger of being dismantled. I can understand the worries, given that just yesterday I put almost all of my Minoa land up for sale at 2 lindens per square meter. But I fairly quickly retracted the offer. Here’s the deal now with Collagesity: it’s going to stay pat as is through at least November 8th. At that time I *might* be making a choice between two locations for the town, the other of which I’ll withhold for now but it’s been mentioned a number of times in the blog already throughout the summer.

And here’s the deal with Wheeler. Last night, Baker Blinker and Wheeler decided to settle their personal differences about the direction of the town via a wrestling match, which Baker *barely* won. As she put it to me afterwards, although about equal in physical abilities, she felt she maintained a certain edge over Wheeler at the end due to her bond with Karoz Blogger. They truly love each other, I’m sure of it. That kept her going and pushing the limits. So she swung a tough match around and won, with the deal struck outlined above. And the best news is that no hard feelings came out of it between the two. They just had differences, and they charted a course to resolve those differences in a logical way by attempting to beat the pulp out of each other. Actually they make a good team because they instinctively understand their limits and how to keep from really and truly hurting each other.

Other things have come out of this Battle for Collagesity. Baker Blinker has earned certain rights which I’ll get into detail more later. Wheeler admitted to Baker that she intended to separate Carrcassonnee from Perch (her “eye”) and use the latter as a super-generator for a space launch beyond the Second Lyfe solar system. Now my regular readers (or reader) will recall that Karoz Blogger has already gone to Second Lyfe’s Moon and back last spring. Stories have surfaced that he’s built a more powerful rocketship in the meantime and went as far as (Le)Mars and perhaps Neptune. But — again — there’s confusion about a trans-solar journey to a distant planet called Muff-Birmingham. This has definitely not occurred yet. The event hides as well within a strong probable future — with masking abilities.

I should also explain that Wheeler is a time traveler of sorts. That’s how she personally knows Perch from the past, when he was just an ordinary man with an extra-ordinary horse named Spider. She’s part of a secret organization named R110 within certain time streams. And connected with that, she’s sometimes seen hanging out in Real Lyfe at a United States where Rutherford “Booger” Hayes was the last president before the formation of The Triumvirate. Wheeler’s seen a lot.

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September 17, 2016 · 7:20 am

Are We Family?

“Where’d your pupil go?”

Wheeler:

Ah, there you are. Perch. How have you been Perch my old friend?

Carr (shaken):

I… I’m not Perch any more.

Wheeler:

I know. The whole assimilation thing. So you want to know about Jorondip, eh?

Carr.:

I didn’t say that.

Wheeler:

On and off. Black and white. I took over. I simply took over. And I took over the thing taken over. I’m just that powerful. Do you know who I am?

Carr.:

Um, you said you were me.

Wheeler:

You’re scared, huh? ‘Fraid I’ll take over *you*?

Carr. (meek; lying):

No.

Wheeler:

Well I can. I *will*. But not just yet. When Spider talks then that’s the End of Days. BoBylon realized. You understand me Perch?

Carr.:

I can’t reach those memories.

Wheeler:

I’ll have that eye and I’ll have you and everything else in this town.

Carr. (grasping):

Spongeberg. Spongeberg can stop you.

Wheeler:

No. Not even Spongeberg The Destroyer can stop me. I’m him as well!

Carr.:

No. Need… Asprind.

Wheeler (more of a whisper):

I’m even… this town. I’m Second Lyfe itself now. My Second Lyfe. *My* Second Lyfe.

(Carrcassonnee has no answer. “DEMON,” she thinks)

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September 17, 2016 · 6:28 am

We Are Family.

Carr.:

Come on out Wilson. I know you’re in there. Come on.

BBloch:

I’m not Wilson. Anyway, I think you want Wheeler. Wheeler is in Wilson. The Wilson-Wheeler dichotomy. Who came first? What came second? Etc.

Carr. (thoughtful):

You’re not Wilson.

BBloch:

No. I came to ask about the collages. There’s a rumor around town that Spider will be let loose within them again.

Carr.:

Not Wilson?

BBloch:

No again. This happened once before LINK. Remember? (turning to Spider) Remember Spider?

Carr.:

Spider will talk one day but not today. Maybe tomorrow.

BBloch:

Are the rumors true?

Carr.:

Who told you this? Wilson?

BBloch:

Not everything revolves around Wilson, Carrcassonnee. *We’re* here. Baker Blinker, Karoz, Hucka Doobie, myself. We’re permanent. The permanent family members.

Carr.:

Do me a favor Wilson. Make a list of permanent and impermanent residents of this town. My town. I can’t move around well enough to do so. Census, perhaps. Yes, a census. Can you do that? Go to each house. Knock on each door of each house. Make a count. Ask pertinent questions. Report back to me. Go.

BBloch:

Alright I’ll do that later but there’s not many residences in town, actually. A lot of galleries, a number of so called businesses supported by the galleries…

Carr.:

You do this for me, I’ll send Spider into the collages. What specifics do you need from my end for the entrance?

BBloch:

I don’t know. What are your ideas about it? Do you have ideas?

Carr. (roaring):

OF COURSE.

BBloch:

O-KAY. (an obviously irritated Baker Bloch looks around for his blown off hat)

Carr.:

I will not argue with you again.

BBloch:

I-I don’t remember arguing before.

Carr.:

This has happened too often. Bring out Wheeler.

—–

BBloch:

Okay, we’re both here now. Just to confuse you more, hehe. So *there’s* Wheeler. Wilson and Wheeler. Two headed girl boy. (Baker Bloch looks at Wilson)

Carr.:

But…

BBloch:

Hold on hold on. I’m going to do a trick. Hold on to your hat Carrcassonnee! I’m going to revolve you around. Let’s see how this goes. Ready… go.

Carr.:

I didn’t feel much.

BBloch (after seeing it wouldn’t work):

No. The radius is too big. I was going to attempt to merge with Wilson.

Carr.:

That would be catastrophic! NEVER try that again. EVER.

BBloch:

Jesus Christ Carrcassonnee.

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September 9, 2016 · 6:56 am

World of Lime? 01

(excerpt)

I could hardly believe it. We would need a road map to figure it all out. It could be said to begin with the letter to Liquor. Rhoda says that Liquor says Mouse is up to his cans. Now here’s the trick. Liquor got the wrong letter. This Mosquitor penned piece of paper, which also has something to do with Quito *and* *mos*quito LINK, was suppose to be delivered to Roostre. But Roostre, in turn, couldn’t open his letter he mistakenly received that was Liquor’s. Instead he’s [time] GAssed by this kooky (cuckoo?) clock.** Carr. then says this is the same clock that is in *our* Rhoda’s bar now. Let me insert a picture.

Oh, I forgot. It’s not there any longer.

Missing Clock.

But anyway, We The Family noticed quite some time ago that this clock actually *moves* on its own volition. We understood this because it started projecting from the back wall of the bar on the outside, and when Baker Bloch would push it back through to the inside wall, it would simply work its way out again. True story. Finally Other Baker got tired of messing with the obviously cursed thing and deleted it. But [12 Oz Mouse character] Clock is *real*. In *Collagesity*.

So that’s one element. Carr. is stating that “12 Oz Mouse” is not dead and that it will live on through her.

Rather early on in the short lived “Mouse”, bartender Rhoda is killed — telepathically sliced in two — by Square Businessman, also just referred to as Square. This comes shortly after Rhoda talks about Liquor’s letter and some other things he’s obviously not suppose to. Now our Rhoda was similarly killed, as documented in the “Baker’s Dream” section of “Collagesity Winter 2015-2016” (and there’s a picture of the now deleted cuckoo clock, three down). But [12 Oz Mouse’s] Rhoda’s death is foreshadowed by a hallucination (?) shared between him, Fitz, Skillet and Man-Woman. This is repeated in Carrcass-1, accompanied there instead by the music of Slint and the track “Rhoda” — no relation to 12 Oz Mouse’s Rhoda. But there’s another strange attractor[ involved]. And “Rhoda” is the only one (of 7 total) Slint songs used in Carrcass-1 not from their fantastic album Spiderland. And that’s Spider again… Spider is another character in “12 Oz Mouse”, and, as Carr. states, has been remodeled as a dog for Collagesity and kind of merged with Skillet, I suppose. So the [central] Fitz/Skillet duo of “Mouse” has been reshaped as the Carr/Spider duo of Collagesity. Getting confused yet? Phew!

But I must plug on… Equador is then mentioned indirectly by Rhoda before his death when he describes or attempts to describe the relationship between New Guy and Skillet. He says that New Guy is not as much cheesy green up on squirrels (Skillet’s species, as verified by Mouse), but more like Ecuadorian sleep. I have no idea what that means, so let me google it. This is indeed important.

https://www.google.com/#q=%22ecuadorian+sleep%22

I have no idea still. And a kind of creepy thing is that this blog post will now show up in the hits for the phrase. If future people do the same google search, they’ll be confounded by the same riddle, add this post.

Ecuador… Quito. Ecuador commonly misspelled as Equador, with a “Q” like “Quito”.

Next door is Columbia and its Bogota. We have jumped up a level. Wheeler.

—–

**an unofficial script for the associated episode (04) has been found here:

http://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/view_episode_scripts.php?tv-show=12-oz-mouse&episode=s01e04

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September 9, 2016 · 6:27 am

Morning Meeting

Baker Bloch sips his morning beer and contemplates further changes for Collagesity. The focus *must* be on that Friends of the Rubi Woods parcel, he believes, the 512 that will remain when all else goes away. That is the foundation, he rationalizes.

But right now, all that’s on it is a still almost empty Home o’ Fibs partnered with a quite premature Christmas tree. Yes, gift giving has come early this year, Baker understands. Wilson-Wheeler.

He heads over to Carrcassonne for a prearranged meeting. Baker Blinker is already there.

Carr.:

Other Baker! Come join us. Baker Blinker and I were talking about changes. Ch-ch-ch-changes. David Bowie will return. What was his pseudonym again?

BBloch:

Bogota. Like the projected collage series.

Carr.:

Yes, I remember now. Bodega.

BBloch:

No. *Bogota*. Like the capital of, um, Ecuador? No, sorry, ~~Bolivia~~ Columbia. [The smaller] Ecuador and its Quito are next door.

Carr.:

That is precisely what I want to talk about with you guys tonight. I hear you are watching “12 Oz Mouse” again up in the real world. The oh so cool real world. Should that be capitalized?

BBlinker:

Well, we’ve had our time to chat so I might leave you and Baker to talk about that.

Carr.:

No no, Baker Blinker. I want to speak with both of you. This involves both of you. “12 Oz Mouse” is very important. And not just because I was the *star* of the show, mind you. (Carr. laughs here)

BBloch (smiling):

You were very good in it.

Carr.:

Good? I was spectacular. My finest role. Perhaps by a good margin. Whadda ya say we go up to the theatre and watch some episodes. Oh, I guess that would spoil it for the user, however, the one that types these things we speak of and orchestrates what we do. Are you up there baker b.?

(All look heavenward. No answer.)

BBlinker:

You say that Karoz is also involved in that.

Carr.:

He is my double in the show. As I’m sure you’re sick of hearing me say, I play Fitz the Mouse, the star. But in *certain* ways, Karoz is also Fitz. And then in other ways, *both* you guys are Fitz. And Spider over here is Skillet, who is a squirrel and not a dog, as Rhoda ponders, or a rabbit, as Roostre guesses. Both are wrong.

(The Bakers exchange glances with each other, like, “here we go again”.)

BBloch (finally sitting down):

Okay, Carrcassonnee. We’ll bite. What’s going on with “12 Oz Mouse”?

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January 2, 2016 · 9:41 am

Decision 01

(joined in progress)

“… put the Elton John album behind me.”

bb:

I’m not sure I can, Carrcassonnee. I don’t own the land behind you. I’d have to link it with something else.

Carr.:

Spongeberg is coming. Time to make a decision.

bb (surprised):

Oh.

(Spongeberg Resident walks into the gazebo and sits down in a chair that Baker Bloch has politely rezzed).

Carr.:

Ahh, my two proud boys together.

And Spider’s my third boy, aren’t you girl? Gooood Spider. Say hello to Spider, Spongeberg.

Spongeberg:

Hello Spider. Hello Baker Bloch. Hello Carrcassonnee. I have made a decision.

Carr.:

Have you made a decision?

Spongeberg:

Yes. The town can stay. For another month. I just wanted to get Baker Bloch out in the woods and thinking about Whitehead Crossing again.

Carr.:

*My* Whitehead Crossing.

Spongeberg:

Sure.

Baker Bloch:

I have some questions about The Crossing, actually.

Spongeberg:

First off, don’t call it that. It’s Whitehead Crossing. (then laughs) Just kidding. You can call it Bob or Joe for all I care. But it’s my home. Keep that in mind. Please.

Baker Bloch:

You still live in the teepee, then.

Spongeberg:

My teepee yes. Carrcassoneee built it for me there, or provided it for me to live in. I visit Second Life from The Crossing or Fred or Bob or whatever. That *place*. Now we must talk of Red Head.

Baker Bloch:

Okay.

Spongeberg:

Red Head is the present, but it’s more the future. I should know. I’ve been there.

Baker Bloch:

Am I there?

Spongeberg:

Yes. You build a cabin. Or you are provided with a cabin. But not the meth head cabin. See?

Baker Bloch:

Absolutely. But what about the same brand?

Spongeberg:

Let’s talk of the bottles. Hucka Doobie’s bottles. He has littered. The — woods aren’t happy. He didn’t litter but he did. The woods blame Hucka Doobie. You must save Hucka Doobie.

Baker Bloch:

Did Hucka Doobie build the teepee?

Spongeberg:

No. Of course not. He doesn’t have the hands. Anyway, that’s what we need to do next. A little bit of woods cleanup. Take a bucket. You’ve seen all this, however. Clean up the woods a bit and the woods will be grateful and talk more with you. But I know you know of Owl Rock now. That was set up — quite a long time ago, actually.

Baker Bloch:

I haven’t read the website I stole the image from.

Spongeberg:

You gave credit. That’s enough. It’s not anyone’s image to own. You don’t own Whitehead Crossing just because you take pictures of it.

Baker Bloch:

Fair enough. Can you speak more of Owl Rock?

(Just then, there was a rumble heard in the sky, as if it was answering instead of Spongeberg. Spongeberg looked confused as well. Carrcassonnee peered at each of us carefully.)

Spongeberg:

Sounds like rain.

Carrcassonnee:

Collagesity is saved. I suspect things have been altered because of it. Perhaps we will experience actual weather in the town now, who knows?

Spongeberg:

Who knows?

Baker Bloch:

Who does know?

(They all shrug at each other.)

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December 30, 2015 · 9:03 am

Shiny Hare in Collagesity…

… but for how long? I can’t see it staying. What does that mean for the future of the town, though, if I removed it. Spongeberg has found its weak spot at Head-of-Stream, now unprotected due to prim trims. Shiny Hare was inserted into the village to pacify the same. Maybe I should send Baker Bloch over to Carrcassonnee for possible aid.

—–

Carr.:

Greetings baker b. How was your beach trip? I heard it was superb — wait for it — *weather* har har har.

bb:

Yeah, the weather was great. Me… not so great, at least the 4th day.

Carr.:

4th, for you, is always bad. You are removed from your comfort zone. You are removed, kind of, from your blog. From Carrcassonnee. From Collagesity, I mean there meant. And then me, Carrcassonnee. And Spider. You missed Spider didn’t you?

bb (turning to Spider):

Of course.

Carr.:

But I hear you are about to produce books. The continent of Corsica is first.

—–

Carr.:

There, that’s better! I can see you now with my gigantic orb, hee hee.

bb:

About the books…

Carr.:

Yes?

bb:

Yes, Corsica will be first. I’m not sure if anyone will understand these books, which, after all, constitute my interaction with these continents as recorded in the blog, and…

Carr.:

They’re not travel guides. Did I tell you I’m going to get up and start moving around Collagesity sometimes? My Dr. — Blood; you may know him — recommends it. Says a totally sedentary life is bad for the old bones, which I don’t have any of. But he made his point. I’ll turn into goo eventually, he reinforces. By the other day — you may know of his wife Wanda. Or is it Linda? Gerta?

bb:

What did he look like?

Carr.:

Metallic. Not green. Exterior beating heart. Pointed head. Had a cat assistant who preferred to stay hidden or not present. Might be the same as your Shiny Hare — dunno. What say you Spider? Is Dr. Blood’s cat Shiny Hare way up there hidden in the air? (Spider does not answer) Anyway, he was here, he gave recommendations, he left. Said he was making his rounds. Was in the area anyway. Asked if there was any other citizens of the community to examine while he was here. What was I suppose to tell him, baker b.?

bb:

What did you tell him?

Carr.:

I told him about Spongeberg. And your father [Space Ghost]. And Bracket, but I said Bracket was dead and a ghost now. No examining needed there, ha ha.

bb:

That was just a shame. And it brings back the point about the Corsica book. I’m doing this partly for Bracket. He was a native, after all, and was poised to write the history book himself upon his return. But he couldn’t return.

Carr.:

How about that bastard Cardboard Diesel Rose, his sidekick for a while in old VWX Town?

bb:

Cardboard Derek Jones[ you mean]?

Carr.:

The flat fellow. One of the flat fellows. The monkey in a [space] suit.

—–

Just then, on cue, Cardboard Derek Jones comes to the door of Carrcassonnee’s gazebo, his presence an automatic request for an audience with the great olive being. I don’t know if CDJ was eavesdroping or it was all coincidence, but he was here now, and I left the two to talk together, perhaps get to know each other better, even. I went around town trying to figure out other stuff I could delete to make room for the Shiny Hare tower. I really wanted to keep it. Soon I was up in Collagesity Heights, eyeing the Church of the Red Doors and its 36 prims. Hungrily.